Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Hold out your hand

We spankos prefer it when the bottom is the target of punitive action - it is what makes us what we are.

But not exclusively so - which raises an interesting question at what point does the infliction of pain to some part of the body lose any interest for us.   Up front, I would say that tooth-ache has nothing of interest to the vast majority of us.   And a migraine is largely of the agenda of pain sensations that set off our internal tingle.

But what about a young lady holding out her hand to have its palm strapped or - more rarely - given one or more stokes of the cane.   Well, the sight is no stranger to most of us.   Because the practice was so wide spread in post-war English school discipline, it does make an appearance in both literature and video.   Is it erotic?   Sometimes, I guess.   A person holding out their hand for pain to be inflicted upon it is about as submissive an act as any one can imagine - right up there with touching one's toes for a similar fate to be inflicted upon a backside.   Submission is definitely among our possible buttons, and getting the palm of one's hand caned or strapped was, in real life, as about non-consensual as it ever got.   The actress is a willing victim, but when in such a posture of complete submission it is easy to pretend that she is not.

Blows across the shoulder and upper back turn up so often in videos of a more punitive nature, that the producers know they have tapped into a money making line.   Before getting, say, 25 strokes of a quirt across her backside, the recipient first gets 25 across the back.   It is not clear to me why a back whipping can intrigue, particular when a bottom one is going to follow, but it is common enough as to be standard fare.

On the other hand, blows inflicted elsewhere to the body simply do not interest me that much.   Frontal whippings are not part of my personal foible, and inflicting pain on the private parts, for me, is quite a turn off.

So my works almost invariably lead to a female getting her bottom spanked.    And there is very little deviation from that one outcome.   For my readers, this is just fine - they want to read about ladies of varying ages getting enjoyable or unenjoyable bottom warmings, and they know that is where my tales are going to take them.

For you and your readers, you need to decide if you are going to stay mainstream, or fill a niche.   And once you have so chosen, there are enough potential readers to keep you happy.

Monday, July 20, 2015

Hello, my little spanko...

As you are acutely aware, even though the internet has torn down the curtain to reveal that million upon million of us (up to 20% of all adults according to some) enjoy some aspects of the spanking scene, we are extremely shy about telling others that we have our foible.

Which makes meeting up with like minds a little difficult.

Suppose, for the sake of illustration, you were a man seeking a female companion - you could not possibly start strike-up conversations with the line "Hello little girl, you look as if you have been naughty.   Does your naughty bottom deserve a spank or two?"   Well, I suppose it is not impossible, but even if you happened to be chatting with a spanko, the chances are that you will have turned her right off getting involved with you.

If you think about it, exactly the same difficulty arises for vanillas trying to pick up other vanillas for some vanilla styled sex.   An opening line of "Would you like to go to bed with me?" is one fraught with rejection of all manner of reasons.

Vanilla or spanko - we all have to dance some sort of dance first.    Except vanillas do not have to introduce the topic of sex into the negotiation:  that is somewhat something of a given when two start the tango that might lead to a bedtime romp.

We spankos do not have spanking as a given in the negotiations:  there is a 50% chance our new colleague has no interest in spanking activity whatsoever, a 25% chance they can tolerate some as a sort of "slap and tickle" approach to foreplay, and 25% are hoping against hope that you share the same burning desire that they do.   Bringing up spanking gives you a 50/50 shot of it being a turn off, and the same chance it might lead to a butt getting a whack or two.   While those are not bad odds, the act of tossing the dice means that we have to show our interest, in outright breach of the secrecy we need according to paragraph one above.

So - what can we do.    Well, first we can hang about on chat forums;  that gives us anonymity while revealing our deepest secrets.    But that is a less than stellar way of finding a real life partner to share some real life activity.

We could attend a "munch" - a meeting of spankos for entertainment and meet up purposes.   But any recovery attempt to deny our spanko nature is doomed to failure.   Another certain breach of secrecy.

We really are left with simply trying to broach the subject while in a one-to-one meeting, in such a way that both parties can do a recovery if the other is clearly not a spanko.

Arm yourself with suitable seques into any topic that makes no statement about what you are hoping to hear.   Television becomes a topic?   There have been masses of TV startles lately - you should be able to bring one to mind without it being on the lines of "Amy clearly loved getting spanked by Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory.   How about you?"      Your own childhood days?   Aw come on - you have to be able to say something about how today's anti-spanking policy is affecting the public behavior of children.   And that gives a good reason to ask your companion what sort of discipline they got when they were younger.   Which might be an interesting topic in its own right.

If your partner makes some sort of mild gaffe, you have a chance to introduce the lame joke, with a very broad smile,  "It seems that you were not beaten often enough or hard enough when you were younger - and it now shows."  Not a rib tickler, and not brought in as such - the reaction to those words might tell you so much about your new potential partner that you will both know how the land lies.

In the manner of a cast member of "Astronaut Wives' Club" you might simply give a friendly swat to the rump of your acquaintance.   An annoyed protest can be countered with "Sorry - I was just giving your bottom a friendly compliment for being so attractive."   It allows you to recover from a hostile response, and move forward if the response was clearly not of a hostile nature.

Now - we would not be having this discussion if being a spanko was not seen as needing to be a carefully kept secret.  Maybe we should all join in some sort of world wide coming out campaign.   And the act of coming out might bring very pleasant surprises in its wake.

Bound to succeed

Sometimes the person about to be spanked is first securely tied to the bench - or other item acting as a spanking bench - before the first stroke is administered.

In the real life world of historic non-consensual beatings, such an act was often part of the ritual:  one example - before a bosun did everything he could to impart serious pain into a miscreant's backside, the victim would be secured across a cannon, so that escape was impossible and the entire ordeal would be completed in one session.

Partly for this reason, some domestic discipline scenarios have a similar ritual - the penitent is secured so that a full measure of discipline may be administered.   But, I suspect, only partly.

Nowadays, I would hazard all adult to adult spankings are completely consensual:  for those that are not lead to rapid appearances before some criminal court to be asked to explain just what one was thinking.

But sometimes the pretense that it is not consensual adds a peppery tingle to the session.   So a second reason that a person may allow themselves to be secured by wrist and ankle to a frame is that, to some degree, the beating is out of control of the one on the receiving end.   There is trust that the caning, paddling or whipping will stay within the bounds of being reasonable, but it is no longer possible to simply stand up and walk away if it is not.

But many of those with a liking for spanking also have the fellow foible of bondage.   When a lady willingly touches her toes to be dealt with in an appropriate manner - that act of submission carries many level of overtone in it.   And to demure to being securely fastened is one of the ultimate acts of submission.

So - when one adult secures another prior to a beating, there are many forces that have come into play:  the submission, the non-consensual nature, and that it is not impossible that pain thresholds might be crossed.   A heady mixture - so heady, I am among those who agree it is one that should only be shared by partners who have earned complete trust in each other.

It would be a disaster to find that your newest, most charming partner is actually an utter sadist once you have made it impossible for you stop any more pain being inflicted.   Only the most dedicated masochist would enjoy such a session - and, to the surprise of vanillas - very few spankos who enjoy being on the receiving end meet the definition of having masochistic tendencies.

If your writing takes your characters into being tied up and spanked, it does not have to turn into a Mood Pictures pain fest.    The delights, sensations and emotions of being secured and whacked can be explored in depth, without the victim having to endure some sort of torture session.   Just a very intense one.

Even in our wildest fantasies, having one eye of it all being SSC is not a bad idea.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

We all have a role to play

Vanillas often wonder why spankos sometimes go to - in their words - laughable lengths by taking part in elaborate role play, as part of their spanking activities.   Two consenting adults - right? - so why not just let the whacking begin?

First, role play allows a ritual to be introduced into a session that adds to it something extra to simply grabbing a partner and whacking away indiscriminately.   By way of example, if your ideal spanking includes scolding before and during, and corner time afterwards - unless into some very serious domestic discipline arrangement - both parties need to play some sort of role where such activity is expected, tolerated and, at some level, satisfy an internal need.

Second, it is very easy in role play to take on the pretense that the person getting the spanking does not wish to be spanked.   We all want to think, at times, the person being spanked would prefer to be elsewhere other than on the receiving end of a good hiding,   So, when husband and wife play the roles of schoolmaster and schoolgirl, it is not (necessarily) to pretend that the wife has returned to virginal purity, but that when she gets punished, she is a most unwilling victim.

Third, role play allows us to explore and revel in experiences out of our normal everyday routines, and even out of our own lifetimes.   Imagining what it might have been like if in a prior life you had been a warder at Bridewell, and really had to deal with prisoners in a formal and brutal way when they broke prison regulations - well, unless you try it, by role playing, you will never know.

And finally - and possibly the most important reason - role play can set up a situation where there is gong to be a spanking purely for the spanking's sake,  And nothing else.   If a wife is playing the role of a school girl, for her teacher to indulge in sexual activity afterwards - as her teacher - would be beyond the bounds of the role play in an all usual circumstances.    Other than in more racy erotica, any school teacher who had sex with a student would do so at extreme peril for their continued liberty - and if nothing else, that background nag would probably take all the enjoyment out of the affair,.

Four very valid reasons for role playing - but each one guaranteed to make the average vanilla shake their head is amused disbelief.   Still, one of the sure fire ways to recruit a vanilla to our ranks is to get them to first take part in a role play session.   But we shall leave that notion for a future post.

A question of gender

There is a shorthand convention to describe the participants in a spanking scene:  F=Adult Female, f=Young Female, M=Adult Male and m=Young Male.   Thus, a mother spanking her daughter can be shortened to F/f and the standard adult relationship is M/F.

You can play around with the letters to see if you get inspiration for some new angle you have not worked on before.   For example, is it possible to write a realistic scenario for bb/FF? - or, if the idea turns you on, could you create some quite fantastical episode where two lads end up walloping the backsides of two mature ladies?   M/Fffffff  suggests a headmaster who is tasked with caning several schoolgirls and their teacher to boot.    Highly improbable but not completely unworkable.   And so on.

It was in this way that I found one of my one road blocks in writing spanking fiction.   If find if I write a  F/M scene, it comes out awkwardly unrealistic and M/M is just downright impossible for me.    Not that I have anything against real world instances of M/M discipline, nor M/M as SSC conduct between consenting adults - it is just that I find no personal interest in writing about such events.  And when I constructed a plot that made a F/M scene inevitable, I had to find a collaborating author to construct something that was realistic and entertaining.

But I am not alone in this outlook.   Surveys suggest that a mere 2% of spankos want to read or view M/M spankings, and the number looking for such material is considerably smaller when the respondents are vanilla.

You need to take note that for entertainment purposes, the majority want to read about /F and /f spankings.   If you are catering for a niche audience, you don't need to worry - but if not, you ought to keep in mind what the average spanko reader wants, if you are going to rely on repeat readers.

Most of the time, our readers want and expect the person being spanked to be a female.   I am not a qualified psychologist, so can only surmise that the "normal" human mindset - that puts males into a more dominant and females into more submissive one - echoes a widespread belief of normal behavior, and therefore one that is more acceptable, in material meant to entertain us.

Try to imagine, for example, the final spanking scene in McLintock! with a role reversal - Maureen O'Hara now chases John Wayne all around town and eventually whacks him with a coal shovel,   It would be very hard for that version to come across as light-hearted and as natural as the scene we actually got.   I suppose it is all part of the human condition.

The F/F and F/f formats are more widely read, for it is a female bottom that gets whacked.   M/M and M/m are less easily read, for the majority of us really do not empathize with any degree of relish the thought of a male bottom getting whacked.    There are exceptions, but few and far between.

So if you should find that you are inspired to write a f/M, of a m/M tale that is not parody, but a serious attempt to entertain, do not be overly surprised if your readers do not praise you lavishly.

Saturday, July 18, 2015

When did it start for you?

It is now seen that spankos divide into two distinct groups:  those who got the first inkling of their interest before the age of 10, and those who acquired it during or after puberty.

I am in the process of constructing a new Spanking survey to try to highlight all the differences between the two groups (suggestions for interesting questions greatly appreciated) but for now, I would like to discuss one that seems to be pretty widespread - but definitely not universal.

We find that vanillas do not understand - indeed cannot understand - the idea of a spanking just for the spanking's sake itself.   Particularly if no element of discipline is involved.   She has a need to have her bottom slapped hard, engenders such an outcome and that is it.   No erotic play of any kind, no sex - nothing.   The spanking was the be all and end all of the incident.

In discussions with fellow spankos, there are some of us who also don't really understand a spanking for a spanking's sake.   It is, in their world view, a prelude to sex or part of foreplay and for them even a discipline spanking is too far outside the SSC equation.

So far, all the spankos I have come across with this mindset are what we might call "late starters" - they acquired the taste at or after puberty.

And that makes a great deal of sense to me.

The 75% of us who started young, tended to find the idea of a spanking to be quite delightful, but the practice to be very unpleasant.   It happens, but it is rare, that young spankos actually put themselves into trouble simply to get another spanking.   It is the thought, not the deed, that intrigues.   (There are a number of theories as to why the young body acts like this, but that is for another post).

After puberty, the 75% of us find that our existing spank drive often gets wrapped around our new sex drive.   And actual spanking activity can take place without any sense of fear or loathing.   A correspondent told me that for the longest time in early teen-hood, she thought the words spanking and masturbation were synonyms.  We have two separate drives that often intertwine, but they are separate.

The 25% latecomers had a sex drive in place before the spanking one got built.   Again there are a number of theories to explain how this comes about, but they all try to show the mechanics of adding a spanking drive TO a sex drive.    Latecomers do not have two drives, the have one which has two distinct featues.

Thus, some of us have two drives and a spanking for a spanking's sake satisfies the one completely, and the rest have only one:  and for them, usually, a spanking without sex just seems somewhat incomplete.

p.s.   If you do have any thoughts on questions to try to reveal other differences, do drop me a line.

Friday, July 17, 2015

Innocent bystanders

In times gone by, it was common for corporal punishment to be carried out in some public place, so that citizens could see justice being done, take heed that such an outcome could be in their own future if they strayed too far, and to make the ordeal more unpleasant for the sinner.

Indeed, at most school's in the UK when corporal punishment was still permitted, the ultimate sanction was to be caned in front of the whole school.   The only crime that seemed to merit such a public setting was that of stealing, and about once a year we would be assembled in the main hall to watch someone caught shoplifting getting a public beating.   And learned to refrain from helping ourselves to goods freely available to the light fingered when visiting department stores.

In the main, domestic spankings were private affairs, conducted behind closed bedroom doors.   The yells and yelps of the wrongdoer alerted the siblings to how severe retribution could be, but, usually it was a private matter between parent and child.   There were exceptions.   Notably, Bridget Bardot was once spanked in front of her entire family for having caused a valuable antique vase to get broken, but she was an exception, not the norm of how things were done in the recent past.

Public spankings of an erotic nature are a different matter.   The spanker and the spankee are there to enjoy themselves and part of the enjoyment is a group of aficionados looking on with the tingle that might come from the echo of someone else getting a sore bottom.   I have never actually attended such a session, not as participant and not as onlooker so I can only surmise that you need to overcome a fair degree of embarrassment in order to fit in comfortably.   Erotic spankings are usually meant to lead to more intimate activities, and I am reasonably certain that the more intimate activities were not part of the entertainment watched by the audience..

For us authors of spanking fiction, setting up the plot so that a spanking - whether consensual to some degree or not - leads to interesting possibilities in examining the emotions of all concerned.   From that felt by an elder woman, grimly pleased to see a young hussy getting her just deserts, through to pleasure felt by some males when they watch a female bottom bouncing up and down, through to the humiliation burning at the wretched wretch getting thoroughly paddled.

There are so many possibilities for us to explore, I shall return to this topic again in the near future.    In the meantime, do experiment with putting your spanking in a public place and see where that plot device leads you.

Making scenes

Stories without any scene setting abound among spanking authors:  we are drilled into the standard plot (there is going to be a spanking, there is a spanking, there was a spanking) that using up valuable white space with petty descriptions of where it all happened seems, to many of us, to have a very low return on investment.

So we get sloppy:  she is caught smoking, gets sent to the headmistress's office, has her backside caned, and rues the sad adventure.   There is no need to spend time and effort describing what a school looks like, what a musty dank corridor leading to the office looks like, or what impact the oak panels have in casting a solemn countenance to the tragic events.

And - full disclosure - I have done the same.   Admittedly, in the torrid little pot boiler "Atonement", the leaving out a scene setting paragraph was one of the deliberate mistakes you were supposed to spot.   But in other would-be "masterpieces", the omission was just careless idleness.

Now, you do not need a huge wad of material to set up a scene,   Tolkien spent over a whole page describing a hole in the ground - an exceptional whole in the ground mind - but some of our tales take less than a whole page in total.   We need to cut our dress according to our cloth, to coin a phrase, for it would be a tad peculiar to spend the whole narrative in setting up a scene and not going anywhere with it..

A scene setter needs to give the reader enough background material for the rest of the tale to have substance.   And we need not go to lengths.   For instance, suppose you want to describe a beating in the manner of the way one might be dished out in the  Royal Navy - back in the days of George III.   You don't have to overdo it.
Eight days out of Portsmouth, HMS Banshee, a 120-gun ship of the line, was in full sail as she ploughed South through light swell en-route to join the sixth flotilla in the Indian Ocean.   Her sails were a brilliant white in the morning sun, and her pennants told the world at large that she carried a Commodore as officer in command.   Two frigates and one supply ship maintained station to her rear.
And that is quite enough to show that the action is aboard a military war ship, far out at sea, on a bright sunny morning.   Even so, some rather dreary research was necessary to avoid making a huge error in the set up. 

But it does not take many words to set out the store of what is to follow.   If you are working on a school girl gets the cane for smoking tale, I really think it behooves a few opening lines to lay out the red brick stones of your old all-female academy, shiny from a light rain shower.   And those oak panels in the Headmistress's study are surely worthy of a mention - they have been there for years and years waiting for you to acknowledge how solemn they make the scene.   But the best thing, your readers will be more comfy in understanding where your narrative takes them.



Thursday, July 16, 2015

Warming up the bottom

Mainly from the influence of spanking videos, and a long established practice among consenting adults, the "warm up" is a standard part of the spanking scene.

And so it should.   When two consenting adults decide to liven up their bedroom romp with a slap or two to the rump, a full blooded whack with a riding crop - as the opening slap - might not lead to the marital bliss initially hoped for.   A set of light slaps inures the buttocks from later harder smacks, and one cane move slowly up the scale, at all times keeping on the "right" side of the partner's pain threshold.   Erotic spankings never really hurt, even if the final few swipes would bring a nod of acknowledgement from a Royal Navy bosun of years gone by.

On the other hand, if some wrong doer is being punished, warming up goes completely against the intent of physical discipline.   The aim is to instantly and significantly cross the victim's threshold of pain to try to ensure there is no repetition of the behavior that caused the punishment to be imposed in the first place.   The whacks do not have to be excessive - they simply have to be effective.   It is not absolutely necessary to use a fearsome weapon to impose the necessary degree of compliance - a bare hand may smack with enough force to make the resultant yelp of annoyed pain to be genuine, and to cause contriteness.

There are two complications you might need to deal with as a spanking fiction writer.

The first is the "willing victim" syndrome.    The young lady (or young man in today's egalitarian society) may want to enjoy all the sensations of being an unwilling victim, but only because they want to feel those emotions.   And in real life, as in fiction, the wielder of the cane walks a very tricky line of wanting each stroke to be just a tiny little over the pain threshold, but not too far as to invoke a safe word.   The beating has to be painful, but not overly so.    In this situation, it is not a genuine warm up that takes place, but as the victim's bottom gets sorer, the pain threshold moves, and the strokes need to become firmer so as to keep the same small degree ahead of the pain threshold.   In real life, it can take partners years to get this exactly right - but the characters in your story can rejoice in the fact you will always be right on the money for the intensity they need for every single stroke you describe.

The second complication comes from watching too many spanking videos.   There are some that depict real good hidings, but they usually last less than five minutes/    So for longer videos different dynamics apply.   Partly from the fact that a lot of discipline actresses in longer videos need warming up before the real action begins, and partly from the director's need to fill a lot of time with some sort of relevant action.   Either way, a penitent is likely get a hand spanking on her skirt, followed by a paddle or brush on the seat of the panties and finally a strap or cane across the bare backside.   For those who want pure discipline, when watching such a video, the fast forward button quickly gets the viewer to the action they want to watch.   However, when reading a tale, skimming forward is not so precise.

In sum - if you write about consensual spankings, a warm up sequence is virtually mandatory.   And when waxing lyrical about punishment spankings, a warm up should rarely if ever be part of the narrative.   

But as always, cater for you readers above any other consideration - if they happen to be avid advocates of warm up activity come what may, their need completely trumps any advice of mine of a more general nature.

The new Political Correctness

Nowhere in the United States is it illegal for a parent to spank his or her offspring.   It is illegal in all jurisdictions to hit a child hard enough for it to be considered abusive.   But reasonable force as a reasonable measure of discipline, while not officially condoned, is accepted as part of the American way of rearing children.

Now here's some curious statistics.   Nearly half of Americans polled on the topic state that they are opposed to spanking of kids.   If those Americans happen to be spankos, those polls give a nearly 75% vote against kids getting spanked.

Yet if you poll kids, and adults, with the question "Did you get spanked by either of your parents/Did you spank any of your kids/ in the last twelve months?" the "Yes" answer is north of 90%.

That is, over 40% of us tell one poll we are anti-spanking, and admit to another we are do spank as a form of child discipline.   Why do we go to such lengths to lie to pollsters?

In my opinion, it is the new "politically correct" attitude we are expected to display when this topic comes up.   The anti-spanking brigade, using the tactics employed by all single issue fanatics, have convinced just about all of us that society does not approve of spanking, and if you do approve, then society will hate you.

Don Cobble, former pastor of a church, found out how this works in practice.   He gave his son a belting, and two years later his conviction for child abuse was thrown out by the Massachusetts Supreme Court as being baseless.   But by then he had lost his job and most of his friends.   And is on record as saying some approached him secretively to say that they also walloped their kids, so, while sympathizing, felt it best if they kept apart for a while.

We are letting the anti-spanking fanatics dictate this debate on their terms.   We need to find some way of bringing truth back to bear on the matter.   Almost all single issue campaigns fail in the face of hard facts:  just look at how badly the "No Vaccinations for Kids" protesters are reeling as reality about this matter comes to light.