The SOM2 comes with a feature that makes long distance cooperation possible - the SOM2PC software allows one partner to send commands to the second partner's PC in order for it to deliver one or a set of spanks, even if that second partner should be on the opposite side of the globe.
To get the SOM2 software to work, you have to install a free widget called phidgets: which actually handles the P.C. to P.C. communications. The SOM panel on one partner's screen sends a "message" through phidgets, which transmits the message onto the host P.C., which then carries out that command.
The network screen on both machines is identical: you enter an ISP of interest, a "passphrase", indicate whether you are the host or are connecting to the host. And that is it. To slightly confuse the issue for a few moments when first entering this screen, is that a dummy ISP is already displayed: you have guess that you need to type the real ISP over the top of it.
Then you press the "connect to host" button and after ten seconds or so you might get an error message which means the host said the electronic communications equivalent of "Sod off! I'm not interested" (Not the exact words, but that is what they mean in human terms). Which is exactly what happened when we tried our first link up.
Many, many, many experiments failed to remove the error message and allow access.
Research suggested firewalls might be to blame. Both computers had the SOM2PC and the phidgets added to the exceptions file. No change. The firewalls were switched off on both machines, No change.
So - Both machines had the extremely efficient but not without risk TightVNC software downloaded onto them. One partner would be able to actually take over complete control of the other computer: hence the risk element inherent with this solution.
And then something significant happened. Trying to connect using the TightVNC resulted in exactly the same sort of error message. Perhaps it was not software, but a hardware problem, that we faced.
A chat with an IT specialist seemed to be in order, and an appointment was duly made.
Friday, July 31, 2015
Thursday, July 30, 2015
The SOM Saga 2 - Hosed
Assembling the hardware that makes up a SOM is "a doddle" according to one end user, and really does not need the on-line video to show you how to do it. All up and ready in no time at all.
However, the SOM2 is powered by an air-compressor. This gives a more swing than an electric motor, and allows for far finer tuning of the power of any one delivery.
The machine does not come with an air-compressor: that you have to buy yourself. This should be no biggie for they are not expensive pieces of equipment. Since you are more likely to use your SOM indoors than out, you are virtually driven to get an electric air-compressor which will definitely keep costs under control.
All you have to do, is connect the hose pipe attached to the SOM to the socket in the air compressor. The instructions that come with the machine contain this gem of a useful bit of advice:
But an air compressor is an air compressor and there just has to be some way to make it fit a SOM, isn't there? Not necessarily. The first air compressor had the SOM hose swirling about quite freely. A helpful web site suggested a coupling device to act as a bridge between the two. Despite the diameters appear to fit the couplings parameters, air still escaped at a rate to stop the paddle arm getting enough to flex its muscles.
The second air-compressor - purchased locally - fared no better. A trip back to the shop revealed that neither of the first two air-compressors could ever have worked with the SOM - the respective specifications were totally incompatible.. C'est la vie.
The third and final purchase of an air-compressor was one that fitted perfectly. A simplistic test run of this third purchase showed that the only real noise came from blasting some air into the SOM for the next paddle stroke, and that that noise was considerably less than a paddle slapping a butt with any degree of real sting.
Incidentally, when testing the SOM without a paddle, only the lowest settings should be used. Part of its integral structure, the SOM needs a stroke to come to a definite stop to prevent internal damage: which is why you should not use a light whip or switch as the implement of infliction.
Still - we now have a SOM2 set up in a private part of the house, and its muscles flex readily with a supply of air pressure. Nothing else could go wrong. Or could it?
However, the SOM2 is powered by an air-compressor. This gives a more swing than an electric motor, and allows for far finer tuning of the power of any one delivery.
The machine does not come with an air-compressor: that you have to buy yourself. This should be no biggie for they are not expensive pieces of equipment. Since you are more likely to use your SOM indoors than out, you are virtually driven to get an electric air-compressor which will definitely keep costs under control.
All you have to do, is connect the hose pipe attached to the SOM to the socket in the air compressor. The instructions that come with the machine contain this gem of a useful bit of advice:
1 Incoming air line. Pressurized air provides the power for the SOM II system, and comes to the head unit through a thick black rubber hose with brass fittings permanently attached to the head. This hose ends in a male quick connect fitting that mates to the female fitting supplied on most compressors or available at hardware stores as “industrial” style. International owners may need to seek out fittings that match up appropriately. Attaching a quick connect pair involves pulling back the collar on the female, inserting the male firmly, and releasing the collar. The fitting should lock together making an air-tight seal.What this really means, after some lengthy experimentation is that American air compressors come with a clip, or collar, that readily connects with the SOM2 hose, but if you get an air compressor in a foreign country, you are very likely to be out of luck. So American consumers need not worry unduly.
But an air compressor is an air compressor and there just has to be some way to make it fit a SOM, isn't there? Not necessarily. The first air compressor had the SOM hose swirling about quite freely. A helpful web site suggested a coupling device to act as a bridge between the two. Despite the diameters appear to fit the couplings parameters, air still escaped at a rate to stop the paddle arm getting enough to flex its muscles.
The second air-compressor - purchased locally - fared no better. A trip back to the shop revealed that neither of the first two air-compressors could ever have worked with the SOM - the respective specifications were totally incompatible.. C'est la vie.
The third and final purchase of an air-compressor was one that fitted perfectly. A simplistic test run of this third purchase showed that the only real noise came from blasting some air into the SOM for the next paddle stroke, and that that noise was considerably less than a paddle slapping a butt with any degree of real sting.
Incidentally, when testing the SOM without a paddle, only the lowest settings should be used. Part of its integral structure, the SOM needs a stroke to come to a definite stop to prevent internal damage: which is why you should not use a light whip or switch as the implement of infliction.
Still - we now have a SOM2 set up in a private part of the house, and its muscles flex readily with a supply of air pressure. Nothing else could go wrong. Or could it?
The SOM Saga 1 - Blocked
If you are physically separated by double figure time zones from a potential partner, the likelihood of mutual play of one sort or another seems somewhat daunting. Unless, of course, one partner has - or can acquire - a Spank-O-Matic 2 (aka the SOM).
The concept is delightfully simple - one partner sits at a local P.C. console - taps an icon on the screen to hand, and then in a different continent, the SOM delivers the precise intensity of whack to the rump of the second partner - the intensity that was just decided by the first partner
But it is a voyage of discovery. And some potential interesting moments on the way. The American manufacturer of the SOM dispatched a discretely cardboard carton to Europe and a few days later it arrived in a Customs warehouse a few miles to the East of London.
When it arrived there, a Customs officer could have been heard asking, in the local argot, of the team: "Here, what is this?" He received a circle of shrugs by reply. "Here, what is this?" (or the equivalent phrases in email terminology) was addressed to the eager would-be importer.
The only way around the impasse, it was agreed, was a face-to-face encounter. "Yes, but what does it exactly do?" was the question eventually posed. The officer listened to the reply with a remarkable stony face, and his nearby colleagues studiously took on the air of those who had not managed to accidentally eavesdrop.
"Right," said the customers office with a certain twinkle in his eye. "I shall deem that this device is a personal massager. That way you will not have to pay any import duty on it." There was a pregnant pause. "But you will, of course, have to pay V.A.T."
There was an exchange of cash from one party and the box from the other. The SOM was now ready to go to its new home.
The concept is delightfully simple - one partner sits at a local P.C. console - taps an icon on the screen to hand, and then in a different continent, the SOM delivers the precise intensity of whack to the rump of the second partner - the intensity that was just decided by the first partner
But it is a voyage of discovery. And some potential interesting moments on the way. The American manufacturer of the SOM dispatched a discretely cardboard carton to Europe and a few days later it arrived in a Customs warehouse a few miles to the East of London.
When it arrived there, a Customs officer could have been heard asking, in the local argot, of the team: "Here, what is this?" He received a circle of shrugs by reply. "Here, what is this?" (or the equivalent phrases in email terminology) was addressed to the eager would-be importer.
The only way around the impasse, it was agreed, was a face-to-face encounter. "Yes, but what does it exactly do?" was the question eventually posed. The officer listened to the reply with a remarkable stony face, and his nearby colleagues studiously took on the air of those who had not managed to accidentally eavesdrop.
"Right," said the customers office with a certain twinkle in his eye. "I shall deem that this device is a personal massager. That way you will not have to pay any import duty on it." There was a pregnant pause. "But you will, of course, have to pay V.A.T."
There was an exchange of cash from one party and the box from the other. The SOM was now ready to go to its new home.
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
.The right angle
Allowing for minor variations within each position, there are precisely six different positions that a person who is about to spanked can assume, and the most significant variation is the angle the legs make with the torso,
The first pair of positions is when there is no angle at all between legs and upper body: the victim lies flat on the floor, flat on a bench or even flat on a table. One variation has the legs together, and in the other, the feet are shoulder width, or more, apart. Video buffs will recognize this position as being favorite of the Russian video producers: flat on a bench or upright at the whipping post.
Now, there are two main areas of the bottom which get spanked: the "meat" that is the center of each buttock, and the "under-hang", that area that lies between the crease at the top of the thigh, and the meat above it.
In this first position, whether legs are apart or not, all the spanks will land squarely on the meat of the bottom. To all intents, the under-hang is effectively taken out of play, except for random strokes from an extremely flexible instrument. Which is why this position is possibly less popular in real life than it is in some movie studios.
The second position is when the thighs are at right angles, or thereabouts, to the upper body. This is the automatic position assumed by someone across a knee, or standing to lie atop a desk (or even the back of a buggy cart). And in this position, both meat and under-hang are both readily available to whatever implement of choice is being used. The whole of the bottom, from cheek top to cheek base is open to chastisement - and the legs together or apart simply increases the ability to land slaps on the more sensitive area of skin that lies towards the very center of the bottom. When the cheeks are splayed, the flesh on the inside of each cheek turns slightly outwards, increasing the chance of each yelp being substantially louder.
And finally, we have the position when the angle is substantially less than 90 degrees. In position 2, the head was level with the backside, now it is considerable lower. The easiest way to achieve this position is "touch your toes" or its American counter-part "Grab your ankles". But there are variations, including the simple kneel on a chair and put your hands on the floor. One film studio has a spanking bench with a hole in its center for the head to be poked through - an out of the ordinary but quite effective manner of achieving position number 3. And the diaper position is a variant of this, save the person being spanked starts by lying on their back.
The act of assuming position three flattens the under-hang to such an extent that for all practical purposes, the meat becomes largely irrelevant. The under-hang has become almost the entire target to be punished. The aftermath of paddling videos, particularly those that replicate school paddlings, end with buttocks thoroughly bruised from top of thigh to just under the meaty part of the buttock. And this is the whole point of a touch your toes caning as well - the welts will lie across the lower, more sensitive part of the bottom. Not only does the position make the penitent take the most submissive posture readily available, the punishment is slightly more effective than that received in position 2. Again, legs together or apart simply increase or decrease the amount of central area flattened to be part of the target area.
As a spanking author, you will be able to engineer your characters into which ever position your plot suggests, and your only issue is how much time you will devote in your narrative to describe what the assumed position has done to make your victim more accessible to the torments, or pleasures, to come.
If stuck for a new plot motif, you could try a spot of reverse engineering. By whatever method, start by choosing one of the six positions. And furniture, implement, clothing. Then try to work out how these two came to be in this exact tableau and work outwards to what started it and what happened afterwards. That she is stood spreadeagled at a T frame to have a dressage whip applied to her rump suggests all sort of plot devices than those that result in her touching her toes awaiting for a rattan cane to reduce her to tears of pitiful remorse.
Not a cure-all, but one tool that you should have in your writer's bag, and understanding the anatomy of the six basic positions will avoid you describing an impact that simply could not have happened in real life.
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
Another spanking survey
The next spanking survey is under construction.
It attempts to quantify exactly what it is that the average spanko does to fulfill the foible, and tries to identify any differences between those activities dependent upon how far either side of puberty the spanking interest developed.
Every single facet of the survey will be as anonymous as possible. The software itself does not know who took part by any traceable method known to computer forensics, and the questions themselves are not tied in any way to the respondent.
I would like to know if you - yes you, dear reader - would like to suggest a question to be included in the survey. If you do - and you want to be anonymous - simply use my contact form and use a fictitious email address. There is no internal gadget to test the validity of the email address you use, only that it is correctly formatted. Nottellingyou@nowhere,com works quite fine, even if email sent to that address will never get delivered. (You can use a real one if you want to enter into a conversation with me, but I promise I never ever get cross with people who use false names and addresses).
I would hope to launch the survey early next month. So if you have a suggestion, please do send it soon.
It attempts to quantify exactly what it is that the average spanko does to fulfill the foible, and tries to identify any differences between those activities dependent upon how far either side of puberty the spanking interest developed.
Every single facet of the survey will be as anonymous as possible. The software itself does not know who took part by any traceable method known to computer forensics, and the questions themselves are not tied in any way to the respondent.
I would like to know if you - yes you, dear reader - would like to suggest a question to be included in the survey. If you do - and you want to be anonymous - simply use my contact form and use a fictitious email address. There is no internal gadget to test the validity of the email address you use, only that it is correctly formatted. Nottellingyou@nowhere,com works quite fine, even if email sent to that address will never get delivered. (You can use a real one if you want to enter into a conversation with me, but I promise I never ever get cross with people who use false names and addresses).
I would hope to launch the survey early next month. So if you have a suggestion, please do send it soon.
No butt about it
I mentioned recently that most humans, spankos included, are quite shy in respect of all matters in respect of our own anus. That we each have one, in most polite conversations, is avoided even more avidly than any topic that might reveal to our stunned listeners that we can get turned on by spankings.
Reading about them is relatively OK - because reading is a very private affair. And perhaps espying one in a spanking video might be quite acceptable for the same reason. Indeed, more than one spanking video actually depicts the pain being delivered directly to the victim's anus: which was no turnoff for the victims depicted in those videos.
Fascination with the anus is not a spanko trait. There are a number of case studies reporting that some vanilla females can only achieve orgasm by way of anal sex: and not because they are over the top kinky.
In male anatomy, the prostrate gland lies within the colon, and inch or so from the anus. The prostate gland, among other functions, sets of the erection and massaging the gland is one way to ensure a long lasting one.
In the female anatomy, the vagina and the anus are interconnected by so many different nerve paths, the family of them are grouped together under the term pudendal nerve, which is not a singularity, but a network.
It has been suggested that spankos who pick up the fascination when very young, do so because of those two factors. A boy contracting his buttocks gives some pressure to a (as yet) switched off gland and it sends a "meaningless" pleasure signal to the brain. Likewise a girl contracting her buttocks causes her vagina to send a similar not understood pleasure signal to the brain.
The pleasure comes from sex circuits that will not be activated until puberty, leaving the child in total disbelief that the thought of pain can be so pleasing.
When we are grown up (ie past puberty) then the connection between anus and sex organs is more clear to us. And those connections lead to all sorts of activities in which anal stimulation is part of the sex act itself. Even unto a cane whacking it with enough force to give a mild pain sensation.
So perhaps you can now see that those ladies who can only get an orgasm from anal sex are not some sort of freaks: it is just that their body chemistry relies more strongly on the way our anatomy is built than others.
What can we take away from all this as spanking authors. The inclusion of some acts that involve the anus are more likely to increase our reader's pleasure than turn them off. As always, plot motivation and style of writing are more important than the clinical detail.
Provided, as always, the activity is taking place between consenting adults in a safe and sane way.
If writing about a non consensual spanking simply describes abuse, you really need to get to terms that writing about non-consensual anal play amounts to a very ugly form of pornography. By my way of thinking, that is.
Reading about them is relatively OK - because reading is a very private affair. And perhaps espying one in a spanking video might be quite acceptable for the same reason. Indeed, more than one spanking video actually depicts the pain being delivered directly to the victim's anus: which was no turnoff for the victims depicted in those videos.
Fascination with the anus is not a spanko trait. There are a number of case studies reporting that some vanilla females can only achieve orgasm by way of anal sex: and not because they are over the top kinky.
In male anatomy, the prostrate gland lies within the colon, and inch or so from the anus. The prostate gland, among other functions, sets of the erection and massaging the gland is one way to ensure a long lasting one.
In the female anatomy, the vagina and the anus are interconnected by so many different nerve paths, the family of them are grouped together under the term pudendal nerve, which is not a singularity, but a network.
It has been suggested that spankos who pick up the fascination when very young, do so because of those two factors. A boy contracting his buttocks gives some pressure to a (as yet) switched off gland and it sends a "meaningless" pleasure signal to the brain. Likewise a girl contracting her buttocks causes her vagina to send a similar not understood pleasure signal to the brain.
The pleasure comes from sex circuits that will not be activated until puberty, leaving the child in total disbelief that the thought of pain can be so pleasing.
When we are grown up (ie past puberty) then the connection between anus and sex organs is more clear to us. And those connections lead to all sorts of activities in which anal stimulation is part of the sex act itself. Even unto a cane whacking it with enough force to give a mild pain sensation.
So perhaps you can now see that those ladies who can only get an orgasm from anal sex are not some sort of freaks: it is just that their body chemistry relies more strongly on the way our anatomy is built than others.
What can we take away from all this as spanking authors. The inclusion of some acts that involve the anus are more likely to increase our reader's pleasure than turn them off. As always, plot motivation and style of writing are more important than the clinical detail.
Provided, as always, the activity is taking place between consenting adults in a safe and sane way.
If writing about a non consensual spanking simply describes abuse, you really need to get to terms that writing about non-consensual anal play amounts to a very ugly form of pornography. By my way of thinking, that is.
Monday, July 27, 2015
A tricky method
One of the joys of being a fiction author is that we can devise devices of utmost cunning without ever having to show that they would work in real life/
Before the Robo-Spanker and Spank-O-Matic machines hit the market, many a spanking author had used automated devices as implements of punishment and/or erotica without once having to file patents for a real life marvelous invention,. One could write, say, "as the crank shaft rotated the paddle swung back and forth with precise and vicious efficiency". That such a contraption could not possibly work was irrelevant - for our reader cared little about the mechanism itself, but the relentless pounding it was delivering to a bottom that truly deserved such rigorous treatment. All the downside of the invention was set aside under the doctrine of "willing suspension of disbelief" for the promise of an upside of delightful consequences.
We really can get away with almost anything in the world of fiction. Take nettles. Delightful plants in the fact they can inflict a sting well on par with just about any implement that might come to a spanker's hand. But - oh! - the complications.
They need to be quite fresh - old stale bunches are as useful as a bundle of wet noodles when it comes to inflicting a smartness intended to awaken the senses totally. Also, the sting only gets injected on light taps - grasp a nettle leaf firmly and it will not hurt one little bit. And we ought to take into account the stems are so soft and floppy as to make them very awkward to use..
But in fiction, we need not take time out to consider why something should not work - only how we can get it to work by making everything come out without mishap.
Pulling a bunch of nettles out of the ground to whack against a bare bottom perched atop our knee would, if you ever tried it, present all sorts of practical problems - from keeping the leaves well away from our own delicate areas, to applying swats lightly enough to draw a howl. And so on.
Well, we writers just tell the reader that it worked out perfectly, and they will rejoice in the thoughts of the results of such wonderful improvisation and not start cat-calling and jeering at just how impractical it all is.
You decide that the ordeal will take place in the open air? No problem - give your hero a huge mansion, a desert island or, if everything else fails, the luck of the devil, and no-one who should not will not come running at the sounds of her yells and her cries for mercy, for pity's sake. Really fresh leaves suggest the nettles are still firmly in the soil. No problem, your hero uses a handy hoist coincidentally located just where it needs to be so that with her srists and ankles secured to its hook, she can be lowered, bare buttocks first ,\\, into the awaiting jaws of stinging foliage.
I suspect that when we take such huge leaps of fancy, we should append a warning tag like they do to most TV adverts in which cars are pushed to the limits of their automotive prowess - you know the sort of thing "Professional driver on closed circuit - do not try at home." If your hero lowers your heroine butt first into a nettle patch, you might consider appending a not dissimilar warning to your epic masterpiece.
Before the Robo-Spanker and Spank-O-Matic machines hit the market, many a spanking author had used automated devices as implements of punishment and/or erotica without once having to file patents for a real life marvelous invention,. One could write, say, "as the crank shaft rotated the paddle swung back and forth with precise and vicious efficiency". That such a contraption could not possibly work was irrelevant - for our reader cared little about the mechanism itself, but the relentless pounding it was delivering to a bottom that truly deserved such rigorous treatment. All the downside of the invention was set aside under the doctrine of "willing suspension of disbelief" for the promise of an upside of delightful consequences.
We really can get away with almost anything in the world of fiction. Take nettles. Delightful plants in the fact they can inflict a sting well on par with just about any implement that might come to a spanker's hand. But - oh! - the complications.
They need to be quite fresh - old stale bunches are as useful as a bundle of wet noodles when it comes to inflicting a smartness intended to awaken the senses totally. Also, the sting only gets injected on light taps - grasp a nettle leaf firmly and it will not hurt one little bit. And we ought to take into account the stems are so soft and floppy as to make them very awkward to use..
But in fiction, we need not take time out to consider why something should not work - only how we can get it to work by making everything come out without mishap.
Pulling a bunch of nettles out of the ground to whack against a bare bottom perched atop our knee would, if you ever tried it, present all sorts of practical problems - from keeping the leaves well away from our own delicate areas, to applying swats lightly enough to draw a howl. And so on.
Well, we writers just tell the reader that it worked out perfectly, and they will rejoice in the thoughts of the results of such wonderful improvisation and not start cat-calling and jeering at just how impractical it all is.
You decide that the ordeal will take place in the open air? No problem - give your hero a huge mansion, a desert island or, if everything else fails, the luck of the devil, and no-one who should not will not come running at the sounds of her yells and her cries for mercy, for pity's sake. Really fresh leaves suggest the nettles are still firmly in the soil. No problem, your hero uses a handy hoist coincidentally located just where it needs to be so that with her srists and ankles secured to its hook, she can be lowered, bare buttocks first ,\\, into the awaiting jaws of stinging foliage.
I suspect that when we take such huge leaps of fancy, we should append a warning tag like they do to most TV adverts in which cars are pushed to the limits of their automotive prowess - you know the sort of thing "Professional driver on closed circuit - do not try at home." If your hero lowers your heroine butt first into a nettle patch, you might consider appending a not dissimilar warning to your epic masterpiece.
Playing away from home
We marry our partners because not marrying them would be the worse thing that could happen in our lives. In general - I suppose there are still some marriages of convenience, but in this modern age so few as to be left out of the equation. Being free agents, we enter into marriage because of all that our partner brings to complete the partnership, and regardless of any defects and faults that may be in the offing.
Which is why, for a number of reasons, we spankos end up marrying partners who are totally and rigorously committed to the vanilla side of the equation. Should they be coaxed into experimentation - and often we don't even bother trying any such coaxing - the experiment is so clearly a disaster, it is never tried a second time.
We accept that our soul mate is not into spanking, and that means there will be no spankings within the marrage.
But what about outside it? At what point does fulfilling a fetish stop being innocent entertainment and conduct that counts as infidelity?
Morality is not easy. Despite the attempts of the ancients to instill a unified code of correct conduct for human beings, morality is still a very personal scale of what is wrong and what is right. Most of us agree, even if only from a passing nod to the Golden Rule, that stealing is wrong. But any Tax Inspector will tell you that it is estimated that over 90% of tax returns show a liability to taxation than a more "correct" application of the tax code would have resulted in. And I am talking about blatant inflation of allowable expenses or reduction in declared income to achieve a lower taxation burden. As it is almost universal that you do not steal a widow's wedding ring for personal gain, telling lies on your tax return is fair game.
So - having a spanking partner outside of marriage. If you follow a Calvinistic or Puritanical way of thinking, you are definitely in breach of your marriage vows. And if not, the justification for satisfying your personal needs gets easier and easier the futher away you move from such arbitrary ways of thinking. Unless your relationship is so open, that the two of you have come to some understanding of what, and what is not, permitted and permissible. But since forgiveness is often easier to get than permission, perhaps the matter has not yet been broached.
In the absences of such an understanding, the first question to ask is whether your partner actually knows of your interest in spanking. The nearer the answer to that is "yes", the less deceipt that is likely to be in play. Second, if your partner caught you in the act, how angry would that partner be? The more certain the act would be forgiven and forgotten immediately, not only the less likely you deed would be seen as an infidelity, the less need you ought to have from keeping it a secret.
As one of my vanilla partners said "I don;\'t care where the hell you get your appetite from, provided that you always eat at home." Now, should you be -unlike me - one of those whose spanking activity invariably leads to an erotic episode with your spanking partner: well, perhaps marrying a vanilla was not the best decision you have ever made in your life. But you knew that without me being so tactless as to remind you of the fact,
In all things marital, we constantly interface with people outside the marital bond: I think both partners are entitled that the other do nothing in any of those interactions what would be seriously upsetting. For, to be quite candid, I would be seriously ticked off with my better half if I discovered she was indulging in her secret desires with some third party because she was too shy to tell me about her need for such indulgences, And under the sauce for the goose precept - knowing that keeps me within the clear and understood rules that my partner and I live our personal lives by,
Which is why, for a number of reasons, we spankos end up marrying partners who are totally and rigorously committed to the vanilla side of the equation. Should they be coaxed into experimentation - and often we don't even bother trying any such coaxing - the experiment is so clearly a disaster, it is never tried a second time.
We accept that our soul mate is not into spanking, and that means there will be no spankings within the marrage.
But what about outside it? At what point does fulfilling a fetish stop being innocent entertainment and conduct that counts as infidelity?
Morality is not easy. Despite the attempts of the ancients to instill a unified code of correct conduct for human beings, morality is still a very personal scale of what is wrong and what is right. Most of us agree, even if only from a passing nod to the Golden Rule, that stealing is wrong. But any Tax Inspector will tell you that it is estimated that over 90% of tax returns show a liability to taxation than a more "correct" application of the tax code would have resulted in. And I am talking about blatant inflation of allowable expenses or reduction in declared income to achieve a lower taxation burden. As it is almost universal that you do not steal a widow's wedding ring for personal gain, telling lies on your tax return is fair game.
So - having a spanking partner outside of marriage. If you follow a Calvinistic or Puritanical way of thinking, you are definitely in breach of your marriage vows. And if not, the justification for satisfying your personal needs gets easier and easier the futher away you move from such arbitrary ways of thinking. Unless your relationship is so open, that the two of you have come to some understanding of what, and what is not, permitted and permissible. But since forgiveness is often easier to get than permission, perhaps the matter has not yet been broached.
In the absences of such an understanding, the first question to ask is whether your partner actually knows of your interest in spanking. The nearer the answer to that is "yes", the less deceipt that is likely to be in play. Second, if your partner caught you in the act, how angry would that partner be? The more certain the act would be forgiven and forgotten immediately, not only the less likely you deed would be seen as an infidelity, the less need you ought to have from keeping it a secret.
As one of my vanilla partners said "I don;\'t care where the hell you get your appetite from, provided that you always eat at home." Now, should you be -unlike me - one of those whose spanking activity invariably leads to an erotic episode with your spanking partner: well, perhaps marrying a vanilla was not the best decision you have ever made in your life. But you knew that without me being so tactless as to remind you of the fact,
In all things marital, we constantly interface with people outside the marital bond: I think both partners are entitled that the other do nothing in any of those interactions what would be seriously upsetting. For, to be quite candid, I would be seriously ticked off with my better half if I discovered she was indulging in her secret desires with some third party because she was too shy to tell me about her need for such indulgences, And under the sauce for the goose precept - knowing that keeps me within the clear and understood rules that my partner and I live our personal lives by,
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Sleep perchace to dream
From somewhat limited discussions on the topic, spankings rarely turn up in the dreams of spankophiles, and when they do, the dreamlike qualities of dreams make such spankings quite unrealistic.
The first problem comes from the way dreams actually get processed by the somnolent brain - a repeat of the same event turns out differently the second time. If, in a dream you go out of a room and return back into the same room, the room will have changed substantially during the few dream moments you were outside of it. This is not some oddity, it is the way in which dreams work. Suppose you were able to look closely at the back of your dream hand while dreaming: it would not look like the one you see during the day: the dream one would be an almost fluidlike surface, constantly changing in pattern as you look at it.
And there are at least two huge problems with dream spankings. A dream arm cannot "move" through the air at the same speed as a real life one. If you carry out a spanking, it will be delivered in slow motion by a leaden arm. A similar sensation is also felt when you try to run: your dream legs cannot move as quickly as real life ones, and you will experience "lead-legs".
Furthermore, it is nearly impossible to feel pain in a dream, except as an echo of a real pain the body is experiencing at the time. If you go to bed with an un-spanked bottom, no dream can give it any sort of realistic tingle. If your butt should be freshly spanked, then your dream might possibly reflect an existing pain sensation, even though it cannot create a new one.
The personal dynamics of a dream spanking can easily reflect your conflicted attitude towards your own interest in spanking. If, like the vast majority of us, your liking for spankings is a closely kept secret, letting the cat out of the bag in a dream is just as difficult as if it were to occur in real life. The horror of those people you know - who have turned up in your dream - learning your secret might be so strong as to wake you up as efficiently has having had a more traditional nightmare.
In sum, dream spankings rarely bring any deep pleasure to a spanko. Once in a blue moon, you might experience one that was as good as watching an on line video. Treasure the moment - it might be a long time before you get a repeat performance.
The first problem comes from the way dreams actually get processed by the somnolent brain - a repeat of the same event turns out differently the second time. If, in a dream you go out of a room and return back into the same room, the room will have changed substantially during the few dream moments you were outside of it. This is not some oddity, it is the way in which dreams work. Suppose you were able to look closely at the back of your dream hand while dreaming: it would not look like the one you see during the day: the dream one would be an almost fluidlike surface, constantly changing in pattern as you look at it.
And there are at least two huge problems with dream spankings. A dream arm cannot "move" through the air at the same speed as a real life one. If you carry out a spanking, it will be delivered in slow motion by a leaden arm. A similar sensation is also felt when you try to run: your dream legs cannot move as quickly as real life ones, and you will experience "lead-legs".
Furthermore, it is nearly impossible to feel pain in a dream, except as an echo of a real pain the body is experiencing at the time. If you go to bed with an un-spanked bottom, no dream can give it any sort of realistic tingle. If your butt should be freshly spanked, then your dream might possibly reflect an existing pain sensation, even though it cannot create a new one.
The personal dynamics of a dream spanking can easily reflect your conflicted attitude towards your own interest in spanking. If, like the vast majority of us, your liking for spankings is a closely kept secret, letting the cat out of the bag in a dream is just as difficult as if it were to occur in real life. The horror of those people you know - who have turned up in your dream - learning your secret might be so strong as to wake you up as efficiently has having had a more traditional nightmare.
In sum, dream spankings rarely bring any deep pleasure to a spanko. Once in a blue moon, you might experience one that was as good as watching an on line video. Treasure the moment - it might be a long time before you get a repeat performance.
Fandom fiction
There is a sub-genre - virtually exclusively in the hands of amateur authors posting to free story sites - of using famous characters from TV, film or written work and using them in a tale.
There are several levels of psychology going on: particularly in the world of spanking fiction.
The easiest one to understand is that the author does not have to spend any narrative on setting up who the characters are, and how they are supposed to interact. If you should elect to have Hermione Granger subjected to corporal punishment by Professor Snape (a tale that really exists on one forum) you do not need to spend time on descriptions or motives. Your fellow Harry Potter fans know exactly who these two are, and why Snape would wish to inflict grievous damage to Miss Granger's hind-quarters. However, you need to keep the tale posted only to some rather obscure site - J.K. Rowling's legal team would have no problem in swinging into action if they had a case you were making profit from copyright infringement.
But if you are safe from legal jeopardy, then it is just a matter of tweaking these pre-set characters to react they way you want. In Book One itself, Hermione (with good intentions) did set fire to Snape's cloak. In your tale, you might add that she later discovers that the ancient student code of corporal punishment for students - who cause actual bodily harm to staff members - was not included in the re-write. That student law is still valid, despite the intent to repeal it. Being that sort of girl, she demands that Snape follow the rules exactly as written. You could even give Professor Minerva McGonagall a serious frown as she warns Hermione that the pain will soon fade, but not the memory that Snape will have seen her bare bottom. See how easy it is!
The second theme is that you can fantasize about just anybody, and make them do your bid and call within the confines of a fandom piece. Perhaps you think that Haley's mother should have taken a hair brush to her rump before now. Voila - in your tale that is exactly what happens. And when you watch all future episodes of that TV comedy series, the relationship of those two onscreen figures will, in your mind, be tempered by that good hiding Mom once gave her teenage daughter.
For the readers of fandom fiction, their motivation is less obvious to me. Full disclosure - I do not enjoy reading fandom fiction. But I can make some guesses. Once the book, film, series is over, then there will be no more from that source. So it is just great that some other sources take over to explore what and how your favorite characters continue after the "official" media is done with them. People go to, for example, a Harry Potter fandom site for the sheer delight of new thoughts and ideas being expounded - provided that all of them stay in role forever. Try to explore Snape's feminine side, and you might find you have become most unpopular on the site.
So fandom fiction gives us rapid access to existing personae and lets them follow our script, provided they stay in their original roles. A not total waste of time, but you should only write stuff for sharing it with fellow enthusiasts, and for free. Having said that, if your piece gives you a fully fledged outline for a professional piece, all you have to do is rewrite it with brand new characters. Granted, they will need fleshing out: but all the hard work is already done. For a wordsmith, this is going to be one of those easy-peasy assignments.
There are several levels of psychology going on: particularly in the world of spanking fiction.
The easiest one to understand is that the author does not have to spend any narrative on setting up who the characters are, and how they are supposed to interact. If you should elect to have Hermione Granger subjected to corporal punishment by Professor Snape (a tale that really exists on one forum) you do not need to spend time on descriptions or motives. Your fellow Harry Potter fans know exactly who these two are, and why Snape would wish to inflict grievous damage to Miss Granger's hind-quarters. However, you need to keep the tale posted only to some rather obscure site - J.K. Rowling's legal team would have no problem in swinging into action if they had a case you were making profit from copyright infringement.
But if you are safe from legal jeopardy, then it is just a matter of tweaking these pre-set characters to react they way you want. In Book One itself, Hermione (with good intentions) did set fire to Snape's cloak. In your tale, you might add that she later discovers that the ancient student code of corporal punishment for students - who cause actual bodily harm to staff members - was not included in the re-write. That student law is still valid, despite the intent to repeal it. Being that sort of girl, she demands that Snape follow the rules exactly as written. You could even give Professor Minerva McGonagall a serious frown as she warns Hermione that the pain will soon fade, but not the memory that Snape will have seen her bare bottom. See how easy it is!
The second theme is that you can fantasize about just anybody, and make them do your bid and call within the confines of a fandom piece. Perhaps you think that Haley's mother should have taken a hair brush to her rump before now. Voila - in your tale that is exactly what happens. And when you watch all future episodes of that TV comedy series, the relationship of those two onscreen figures will, in your mind, be tempered by that good hiding Mom once gave her teenage daughter.
For the readers of fandom fiction, their motivation is less obvious to me. Full disclosure - I do not enjoy reading fandom fiction. But I can make some guesses. Once the book, film, series is over, then there will be no more from that source. So it is just great that some other sources take over to explore what and how your favorite characters continue after the "official" media is done with them. People go to, for example, a Harry Potter fandom site for the sheer delight of new thoughts and ideas being expounded - provided that all of them stay in role forever. Try to explore Snape's feminine side, and you might find you have become most unpopular on the site.
So fandom fiction gives us rapid access to existing personae and lets them follow our script, provided they stay in their original roles. A not total waste of time, but you should only write stuff for sharing it with fellow enthusiasts, and for free. Having said that, if your piece gives you a fully fledged outline for a professional piece, all you have to do is rewrite it with brand new characters. Granted, they will need fleshing out: but all the hard work is already done. For a wordsmith, this is going to be one of those easy-peasy assignments.
Friday, July 24, 2015
The bare truth
Pander me for a while while I take us through one of my own favorite experiences and themes for spanking fiction. She is comfortably across my knee, skirt properly lifted, and is ready for her bottom to be turned from relaxed ease into one that has been well chastised.
A question worthy of exploring from a narrative point of view: Who pulls down the panties?
A very short space of time for the act to take place, but so many delicious dynamics can come into play - particularly for written narrative or video.
If I simply pull down her panties, an aspect of my dominance has come into play, and if she does one of her submissiveness is in effect. Either is pretty cool, depending on the circumstances and each has its own impact on heightening the ensuing pleasure.
Unless it is a discipline spanking and she does not want it to be on her bare bottom. It goes without saying that if I have decided it will be on her naked bottom, then that is how it will happen - but we face a temporary act of defiance by her.
If I tell her to take down her panties and she flatly refuses, we have some sort of physical or psychological battle on our hands. And, rankly, the only way of overcoming it is to give her enough pre-spanking spanks to make her change her mind.
On the other hand, if I try to pull down her panties and she twists and writhes in a vain attempt to halt the proceedings, at most she has only delayed the inevitable by a few seconds, and during that delay has repeatedly shown me just how soft and malleable her buttocks are. Which is no bad thing.
So - in real life - a SSC spanking that may (but perhaps not) lead to a romp of a more erotic nature, telling her to pull down her panties as no downside and increases the amount of her submission to my authority. And a punishment spanking almost demands that I assert my authority by pulling them down regardless of any protest.
In fiction, you may want to use this moment to clarify the respective roles of your two characters. His act, or demand, says something about the authority he has over her, And her compliance or rebellion something about her acceptance of that authority.
A ploy worth having in your back of tricks to flesh out the emotions and sensations swirling around a spanking scene.
A question worthy of exploring from a narrative point of view: Who pulls down the panties?
A very short space of time for the act to take place, but so many delicious dynamics can come into play - particularly for written narrative or video.
If I simply pull down her panties, an aspect of my dominance has come into play, and if she does one of her submissiveness is in effect. Either is pretty cool, depending on the circumstances and each has its own impact on heightening the ensuing pleasure.
Unless it is a discipline spanking and she does not want it to be on her bare bottom. It goes without saying that if I have decided it will be on her naked bottom, then that is how it will happen - but we face a temporary act of defiance by her.
If I tell her to take down her panties and she flatly refuses, we have some sort of physical or psychological battle on our hands. And, rankly, the only way of overcoming it is to give her enough pre-spanking spanks to make her change her mind.
On the other hand, if I try to pull down her panties and she twists and writhes in a vain attempt to halt the proceedings, at most she has only delayed the inevitable by a few seconds, and during that delay has repeatedly shown me just how soft and malleable her buttocks are. Which is no bad thing.
So - in real life - a SSC spanking that may (but perhaps not) lead to a romp of a more erotic nature, telling her to pull down her panties as no downside and increases the amount of her submission to my authority. And a punishment spanking almost demands that I assert my authority by pulling them down regardless of any protest.
In fiction, you may want to use this moment to clarify the respective roles of your two characters. His act, or demand, says something about the authority he has over her, And her compliance or rebellion something about her acceptance of that authority.
A ploy worth having in your back of tricks to flesh out the emotions and sensations swirling around a spanking scene.
Feeling guilty
Some spankos feel guilty - not because they have been caught red handed and know what is going to happen to them - but about being spankos.
When one part of society points at a different part of society with a different world view, the part pointed at can be made to suffer in all sorts of unhealthy ways.
A classic example - even in today's enlightened society - is the way groups of heterosexuals treat homosexuals. Largely based on misreading holy scripture, some religions tell gays that they are willfully sinning against God, and will spend all eternity screaming in hell fire for making the wrong choice. (This is not the blog for discussing this at length - but if the word "eloah" really, really meant "Abomination" (which it doesn't), the modern meaning of abomination was given in the 13th century. Whatever the ancients meant when they scribed that what might possibly be described as a homosexual act, it was eloah, they were not talking in the words of Roman Catholic homophobes).
Anyway, the conservative religions have dumped so much guilt onto teenage homosexuals, that a counter group has been set up to reduce the number of suicides among teenage gays. Honest - if you want more detail, Google for "It gets better" and you will see what the good guys are doing to reduced one harmful effect of not understanding scripture.
Back to spanking.
One topic that turns up pretty regularly on self help psychological forums is a request from someone on how to "get rid" of a spanking fetish. The reason why spankings have become part of the sex drive vary - but almost always hark back to childhood spankings - but instead of healthy acceptance to embrace the foible, the writer wallows in the guilt of having such "unnatural" desires. Fellow writers (who seem to have no formal training in psychology advise "ignore it and it will go away" strategies. All very sad.
SSC spankings between adults is quite delightful and - apart from some mild bruising - does not damage the participants in any manner that should cause alarm.
I think we are seeing a spill over from the anti-spanking brigade. Those fanatics are so self assured that no good can ever come from swatting a child - despite all the evidence to the contrary - that their propaganda has spilled over into the area of what makes the "correct" set of sexual preferences.
It behooves us all to try to engender the notion that being a spanko is no cause for shame. The problem is, I guess, the vast majority have secrecy ingrained into us, that even talking about it is a task that simply cannot happen.
When one part of society points at a different part of society with a different world view, the part pointed at can be made to suffer in all sorts of unhealthy ways.
A classic example - even in today's enlightened society - is the way groups of heterosexuals treat homosexuals. Largely based on misreading holy scripture, some religions tell gays that they are willfully sinning against God, and will spend all eternity screaming in hell fire for making the wrong choice. (This is not the blog for discussing this at length - but if the word "eloah" really, really meant "Abomination" (which it doesn't), the modern meaning of abomination was given in the 13th century. Whatever the ancients meant when they scribed that what might possibly be described as a homosexual act, it was eloah, they were not talking in the words of Roman Catholic homophobes).
Anyway, the conservative religions have dumped so much guilt onto teenage homosexuals, that a counter group has been set up to reduce the number of suicides among teenage gays. Honest - if you want more detail, Google for "It gets better" and you will see what the good guys are doing to reduced one harmful effect of not understanding scripture.
Back to spanking.
One topic that turns up pretty regularly on self help psychological forums is a request from someone on how to "get rid" of a spanking fetish. The reason why spankings have become part of the sex drive vary - but almost always hark back to childhood spankings - but instead of healthy acceptance to embrace the foible, the writer wallows in the guilt of having such "unnatural" desires. Fellow writers (who seem to have no formal training in psychology advise "ignore it and it will go away" strategies. All very sad.
SSC spankings between adults is quite delightful and - apart from some mild bruising - does not damage the participants in any manner that should cause alarm.
I think we are seeing a spill over from the anti-spanking brigade. Those fanatics are so self assured that no good can ever come from swatting a child - despite all the evidence to the contrary - that their propaganda has spilled over into the area of what makes the "correct" set of sexual preferences.
It behooves us all to try to engender the notion that being a spanko is no cause for shame. The problem is, I guess, the vast majority have secrecy ingrained into us, that even talking about it is a task that simply cannot happen.
Thursday, July 23, 2015
The big turn on
Spankos get turned on by spankings - that is taken as a self evident truth. But when you ask spankos what it is that turns them on, you get different answers.
As you probably already known, the largest sex organ in the human body is the brain, All pleasure, taste, sight, tactile, orgasmic, whatever, happens inside the brain and the trigger outside of the brain simply initiates a pleasure sequence deep inside the head.
Virtually any nerve system in the body can trigger the pleasure circuit to tingle. Hence, let someone with a foot fetish loose on a suitable pair of feet, and watch near ecstasy take center stage. Horses for courses and other useful adages come to mind.
Some hypothesize that the sight of buttocks turning red is linked to some primordial mating signal in the manner of some primates who still use colored hind quarters as an indication of readiness to mate. But that tends to overlook the fact that most spankos are way less primitive than the average human being.
Another theory, that does not stand very close scrutiny, is that a body in agony mimics that of a body in high sexual stimulation: groans, moans, wild shaking of limbs... I did say, it does not stand very close scrutiny.
So what is the one big trigger? There isn't one. Whatever reduces you to a whimpering wreck of sexual delight may be the biggest turn off that the next in line has ever heard.
It all depends upon what stimuli trigger the pleasure circuits in any one brain, and the personal journeys of each of us has brought us to our own personal vision of heaven.
There are some common experiences and they can lead to some generalizations. The prostrate gland in the human male lies near the outer end of the colon: pressure close to the anus could cause the colon to contract in that areas, causing the prostate gland to feel as if it were being massaged. An act virtually guaranteed to cause an erection. So some come up with an equation that goes along the lines of spank = contraction = massage action = pleasure sensation. And for some, but not all, that does happen.
Likewise, within the nether regions of a lady, the vagina and the anus are closely coordinated in sensations by the pudendal nerves. Which gives another formula spank = contraction of anus = contraction of vagina = pleasure sensation. Again, true for some, but a great universal truth,
The tactile sensation of hand on bottom, from either side of that equation, is not unpleasant. The dominance/subservience of a spanking can trigger all sorts of deep tingles. And the simple memory of how prior episodes led to great relief can, just by itself, be sufficient to set us off down that path once again.
From surveys, we on the dominant side do get higher when the spanking is "supposed" to be unwilling, and those on the submissive side have reported that the dominant's pleasure in what is going on far outweighs their own.
Even so, there is an unwritten SSC contract binding us all, and we breach that to slake our own lust at great peril to our own relationships. Only when fantasizing in fiction can we ever cross that bounday line.
As you probably already known, the largest sex organ in the human body is the brain, All pleasure, taste, sight, tactile, orgasmic, whatever, happens inside the brain and the trigger outside of the brain simply initiates a pleasure sequence deep inside the head.
Virtually any nerve system in the body can trigger the pleasure circuit to tingle. Hence, let someone with a foot fetish loose on a suitable pair of feet, and watch near ecstasy take center stage. Horses for courses and other useful adages come to mind.
Some hypothesize that the sight of buttocks turning red is linked to some primordial mating signal in the manner of some primates who still use colored hind quarters as an indication of readiness to mate. But that tends to overlook the fact that most spankos are way less primitive than the average human being.
Another theory, that does not stand very close scrutiny, is that a body in agony mimics that of a body in high sexual stimulation: groans, moans, wild shaking of limbs... I did say, it does not stand very close scrutiny.
So what is the one big trigger? There isn't one. Whatever reduces you to a whimpering wreck of sexual delight may be the biggest turn off that the next in line has ever heard.
It all depends upon what stimuli trigger the pleasure circuits in any one brain, and the personal journeys of each of us has brought us to our own personal vision of heaven.
There are some common experiences and they can lead to some generalizations. The prostrate gland in the human male lies near the outer end of the colon: pressure close to the anus could cause the colon to contract in that areas, causing the prostate gland to feel as if it were being massaged. An act virtually guaranteed to cause an erection. So some come up with an equation that goes along the lines of spank = contraction = massage action = pleasure sensation. And for some, but not all, that does happen.
Likewise, within the nether regions of a lady, the vagina and the anus are closely coordinated in sensations by the pudendal nerves. Which gives another formula spank = contraction of anus = contraction of vagina = pleasure sensation. Again, true for some, but a great universal truth,
The tactile sensation of hand on bottom, from either side of that equation, is not unpleasant. The dominance/subservience of a spanking can trigger all sorts of deep tingles. And the simple memory of how prior episodes led to great relief can, just by itself, be sufficient to set us off down that path once again.
From surveys, we on the dominant side do get higher when the spanking is "supposed" to be unwilling, and those on the submissive side have reported that the dominant's pleasure in what is going on far outweighs their own.
Even so, there is an unwritten SSC contract binding us all, and we breach that to slake our own lust at great peril to our own relationships. Only when fantasizing in fiction can we ever cross that bounday line.
Resistence is useless
It would seem to me that we have two sorts of submissives on the spanking scene - the pacifist and the fighter.
The pacifist admits defeat as soon as the penalty is spelled out - goes across a knee or a desk without a word of protest and hangs on in until the final spank has finished its blistering effect.
And the fighter kicks and yells and does everything possible to delay the inevitable - and even once it has started, continue to delay its conclusion for as long as humanly possible.
And each has their role to play in our fantasies. The noble heroine, going to her fate, can engender both sympathy and empathy. And if nothing else, the bottom will be an easy target. On the other hand, a wild cat brat flatly refusing to take her punishment strongly reinforces the unwilling victim aspect that acts as added pepper some of the time. And wriggling about does give one more opportunities to see forbidden charms than when staring at a stoic and solidly clenched pair of thighs.
Video producers love fighters - simply for the fact that overcoming the struggles is taking up chunks of recording time that otherwise would have to be filled with ad lib dialogue, and we all know how bad that can turn out.
But you might have spotted the RealSpankingsNetwork and Pain4Fem are making fortunes with simple "Come here - assume the position - take that" shorts that are very low on talk, very low on resistance and very high on pain infliction. And while English Spanking Classics still make their videos available for sale - full of tantrums and jumping around - they are virtually out of production.
As writers we can feed our readers what makes them tingle - and all the evidence points to them preferring spankees who grit their teeth and take their whacks. Grunts of pain are well within order - but "keep your hands off me, you brute" goes into a zone most readers don't really care. for.
The pacifist admits defeat as soon as the penalty is spelled out - goes across a knee or a desk without a word of protest and hangs on in until the final spank has finished its blistering effect.
And the fighter kicks and yells and does everything possible to delay the inevitable - and even once it has started, continue to delay its conclusion for as long as humanly possible.
And each has their role to play in our fantasies. The noble heroine, going to her fate, can engender both sympathy and empathy. And if nothing else, the bottom will be an easy target. On the other hand, a wild cat brat flatly refusing to take her punishment strongly reinforces the unwilling victim aspect that acts as added pepper some of the time. And wriggling about does give one more opportunities to see forbidden charms than when staring at a stoic and solidly clenched pair of thighs.
Video producers love fighters - simply for the fact that overcoming the struggles is taking up chunks of recording time that otherwise would have to be filled with ad lib dialogue, and we all know how bad that can turn out.
But you might have spotted the RealSpankingsNetwork and Pain4Fem are making fortunes with simple "Come here - assume the position - take that" shorts that are very low on talk, very low on resistance and very high on pain infliction. And while English Spanking Classics still make their videos available for sale - full of tantrums and jumping around - they are virtually out of production.
As writers we can feed our readers what makes them tingle - and all the evidence points to them preferring spankees who grit their teeth and take their whacks. Grunts of pain are well within order - but "keep your hands off me, you brute" goes into a zone most readers don't really care. for.
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
The age gap
The perceived wisdom of heterosexual marriage - at least in the UK when I was a lad - was that the husband should be slightly, but not excessively, older than the wife. Exceptions abounded all over the place, but were always seen as being exceptions to the rule. A wife "too young" was either indicative of a gold digger in action, or a dirty old man getting his wicked way, depending upon your point of view. A wife "too old" was usually indicative of a mommy's boy achieving his ideal partner.
And this seems to have spilled over into spanking fiction: the participants in an adult relationship that is SSC are expected to be of about the same age: and in the genre of erotic spanking, in their youthful prime. When the shorthand M/F is used, he may be excessively dominant and she excessively submissive, but woe betide you if you make it clear there is a huge age gap between them. Particularly if the action after the spanking turns into a sex romp.
The same sort of unwritten rule seems to apply to discipline, in real life as in spanking fiction. A male disciplinarian is expected to out-age a female penitent, by some degree, however small. M/F is back to our heterosexual marriage rule, M/f is dad whacking his teenage daughter and M/g is a teacher whacking a young schoolgirl. (Point worthy of note - any /g tale is fraught with potential difficulty and having a very young girl get spanked is more likely to get you hate mail than a growing band of followers) - of course, your mileage may vary.
When we have protagonists who are F/f and F/g the age gap is instantly obvious. F/F has some interesting age considerations in play, You might find that if the two ladies are of similar age, you have no need for narrative to explain their relationship and that the bigger the difference in age there is, the more detail you have to deal out. However, should your tale have some twenty year old young woman taking her hairbrush to a forty year old's bottom, you really will have to spend a lot of time showing how such an unlikely outcome came about. On the other hand, it does not need anywhere near as much work when a 40 year old teaches a lesson to someone in her acquaintance who is only 20 years old.
The scenarios of M/m, M/b, F/m and F/b clearly have no problems dealing with the inherent ageism we spankos seem to have. And when it comes to M/M and F/M, we are in area where I have no personal experience or observation to share with you. I suspect that the dominant party "ought" to be about the same age or slightly older than the submissive one, but really don't know for sure. But even as an outsider looking in, I think that if you write about a 20 year old young woman taking a cane to a 40 year old male, you will need a lot of set up to get the reader to be comfy with the situation.
And this seems to have spilled over into spanking fiction: the participants in an adult relationship that is SSC are expected to be of about the same age: and in the genre of erotic spanking, in their youthful prime. When the shorthand M/F is used, he may be excessively dominant and she excessively submissive, but woe betide you if you make it clear there is a huge age gap between them. Particularly if the action after the spanking turns into a sex romp.
The same sort of unwritten rule seems to apply to discipline, in real life as in spanking fiction. A male disciplinarian is expected to out-age a female penitent, by some degree, however small. M/F is back to our heterosexual marriage rule, M/f is dad whacking his teenage daughter and M/g is a teacher whacking a young schoolgirl. (Point worthy of note - any /g tale is fraught with potential difficulty and having a very young girl get spanked is more likely to get you hate mail than a growing band of followers) - of course, your mileage may vary.
When we have protagonists who are F/f and F/g the age gap is instantly obvious. F/F has some interesting age considerations in play, You might find that if the two ladies are of similar age, you have no need for narrative to explain their relationship and that the bigger the difference in age there is, the more detail you have to deal out. However, should your tale have some twenty year old young woman taking her hairbrush to a forty year old's bottom, you really will have to spend a lot of time showing how such an unlikely outcome came about. On the other hand, it does not need anywhere near as much work when a 40 year old teaches a lesson to someone in her acquaintance who is only 20 years old.
The scenarios of M/m, M/b, F/m and F/b clearly have no problems dealing with the inherent ageism we spankos seem to have. And when it comes to M/M and F/M, we are in area where I have no personal experience or observation to share with you. I suspect that the dominant party "ought" to be about the same age or slightly older than the submissive one, but really don't know for sure. But even as an outsider looking in, I think that if you write about a 20 year old young woman taking a cane to a 40 year old male, you will need a lot of set up to get the reader to be comfy with the situation.
The hole truth
You need to be quite adult about this - we need to have a talk about some of the human orifices. They have an impact or your readers' sexual drive, and thereby could impact your writing. And it is not impossible you might get to understand yourself a little better.
There are over 60 types of sphincter, or anus, in the human body but only one that we can readily identify: to such an extant that the word anus has, for the vast majority of us, become to mean that one. The one that everyone has, but very few ever get around to talking about. The possession of an anus seems to be a bigger secret than having a spanking element to one's psyche. By far, the item most often stolen by shop lifters are hemorrhoid treatments - because being caught stealing is far less shameful than letting a store clerk of an embarrassing medical condition.
At the other extreme, some people get a great deal of innocent pleasure from wearing "butt-plugs" - a sort of dildo that is inserted into the anus and left there for a while.
Which makes the topic of anuses a tad tricky for us writers of spanking fiction. The slaps are being delivered in close proximity to an anus - in some forms of extreme BDSM to the actual anus itself - and as writers we can narrate about it or turn a blind eye to it. Which is more correct? It depends.
There are three words that are perfectly permissible in "polite" fiction: penis, vagina and anus. Provided that very few adjectives are added to any of those three nouns: too many adjectives and the line has been crossed taking our work outside that which is considered polite. And if you use any of the common crude terms instead of the scientific nomenclature, you have instantly become "impolite". Indeed, lots of adjectives with crude terms and you meet one of the more common definitions of pornography.
Writing pornography is perfectly OK - provided that you do not try to sell it to people having disguised and promoted it as polite fiction. That would be some sort of breach of trust in the unwritten contract between author and reader.
If your target audience is one that expects you stay within the confines of polite society, then mentioning the existence of the anus between the buttocks should only occur if, for some reason, it is germane to the story. And even then, only a passing reference. If you are writing to those who enjoy pornography, describing in meticulous detail the spankee's anus and what happens to it during the course of your tale is not only warranted, omitting it would - for some readers - be something of a let down. Your readers, your writing.
That is enough on this topic for today. It might interest you to know why the anus is part of the sex drive, and that is a topic I shall return to in the near future.
There are over 60 types of sphincter, or anus, in the human body but only one that we can readily identify: to such an extant that the word anus has, for the vast majority of us, become to mean that one. The one that everyone has, but very few ever get around to talking about. The possession of an anus seems to be a bigger secret than having a spanking element to one's psyche. By far, the item most often stolen by shop lifters are hemorrhoid treatments - because being caught stealing is far less shameful than letting a store clerk of an embarrassing medical condition.
At the other extreme, some people get a great deal of innocent pleasure from wearing "butt-plugs" - a sort of dildo that is inserted into the anus and left there for a while.
Which makes the topic of anuses a tad tricky for us writers of spanking fiction. The slaps are being delivered in close proximity to an anus - in some forms of extreme BDSM to the actual anus itself - and as writers we can narrate about it or turn a blind eye to it. Which is more correct? It depends.
There are three words that are perfectly permissible in "polite" fiction: penis, vagina and anus. Provided that very few adjectives are added to any of those three nouns: too many adjectives and the line has been crossed taking our work outside that which is considered polite. And if you use any of the common crude terms instead of the scientific nomenclature, you have instantly become "impolite". Indeed, lots of adjectives with crude terms and you meet one of the more common definitions of pornography.
Writing pornography is perfectly OK - provided that you do not try to sell it to people having disguised and promoted it as polite fiction. That would be some sort of breach of trust in the unwritten contract between author and reader.
If your target audience is one that expects you stay within the confines of polite society, then mentioning the existence of the anus between the buttocks should only occur if, for some reason, it is germane to the story. And even then, only a passing reference. If you are writing to those who enjoy pornography, describing in meticulous detail the spankee's anus and what happens to it during the course of your tale is not only warranted, omitting it would - for some readers - be something of a let down. Your readers, your writing.
That is enough on this topic for today. It might interest you to know why the anus is part of the sex drive, and that is a topic I shall return to in the near future.
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Implement of Choice
Quite often, simply by selecting an implement with which to punish a bottom, an author leaves it at that. The protagonist delivers ten crisp cracks of a crop, and the reader is left to connect the dots. A double edged sword, for the reader may make the beating meet some unstated ideal, but the reader may end up with a bottom that looks nothing like the one you imagined at the time of writing.
This is because the same implement may have different effects depending upon how it is used.
There are two main spanking motions: back and forth in the manner of an oak paddle, or swished across the bottom as in the manner of a prison strap. The outcome will be quite different.
A birch rod used as a paddle is fairly tame - and the sorest part of the victim's body is more likely to be the right hip rather than the bottom itself (the tips of the birch can curl around the butt, and it is where the tips land that cause the greatest pain). A birch rod used with a whipping motion is a different matter altogether - this is the Victorian way, and it is designed to draw blood quickly and efficiently. Six of the best of a birch used in a spanking motion might produce a yelp - six with a whipping motion is almost guaranteed to produce screams of pain.
And so it goes on. A plimsoll (a British gym shoe with a flat rubber sole) used with a spanking motion caused a schoolkid to return to their desk with a sullen frown. Used with swish would have the same schoolkid hopping up and down in a very lively manner, before returning to their desk with eyes brimming with tears.
Some implements - of the whip family, such as quirt, sjambok or buggy whip - are clearly meant to be used with a whipping motion. And when so used, were constructed in such a way that the blows were likely to break the skin. As authors, we might not want our characters to end up with bloody bottoms, but if we do not spell it out clearly, our readers may read the scene and conclude that a blood fest is what we intended.
Some implements - of the stiff paddle family - can virtually only be used with a back and forth spanking motion. Dependent upon size, weight, and strength of arm, the most likely outcome is a pair of severely bruised buttocks. If extensive bruising is not your intent - and more important, not an effect your readers relish - when you decide a paddle is going to be the choice of implement, you need to take time to make it clear that the size, weight and/or strength of arm is such that the bottom will tingle a healthy deep pink, and not turn black.
And then we have those that can be used either way. A garden cane used with a spanking motion is going to sting like merry hell - but one used with a whipping motion will raise welts of a much more serious nature.
So, unless we do not care what our reader thinks has happened to the bottom under duress, it behooves us to give enough clues that the picture in the reader's mind is the one that we wish to draw.
This is because the same implement may have different effects depending upon how it is used.
There are two main spanking motions: back and forth in the manner of an oak paddle, or swished across the bottom as in the manner of a prison strap. The outcome will be quite different.
A birch rod used as a paddle is fairly tame - and the sorest part of the victim's body is more likely to be the right hip rather than the bottom itself (the tips of the birch can curl around the butt, and it is where the tips land that cause the greatest pain). A birch rod used with a whipping motion is a different matter altogether - this is the Victorian way, and it is designed to draw blood quickly and efficiently. Six of the best of a birch used in a spanking motion might produce a yelp - six with a whipping motion is almost guaranteed to produce screams of pain.
And so it goes on. A plimsoll (a British gym shoe with a flat rubber sole) used with a spanking motion caused a schoolkid to return to their desk with a sullen frown. Used with swish would have the same schoolkid hopping up and down in a very lively manner, before returning to their desk with eyes brimming with tears.
Some implements - of the whip family, such as quirt, sjambok or buggy whip - are clearly meant to be used with a whipping motion. And when so used, were constructed in such a way that the blows were likely to break the skin. As authors, we might not want our characters to end up with bloody bottoms, but if we do not spell it out clearly, our readers may read the scene and conclude that a blood fest is what we intended.
Some implements - of the stiff paddle family - can virtually only be used with a back and forth spanking motion. Dependent upon size, weight, and strength of arm, the most likely outcome is a pair of severely bruised buttocks. If extensive bruising is not your intent - and more important, not an effect your readers relish - when you decide a paddle is going to be the choice of implement, you need to take time to make it clear that the size, weight and/or strength of arm is such that the bottom will tingle a healthy deep pink, and not turn black.
And then we have those that can be used either way. A garden cane used with a spanking motion is going to sting like merry hell - but one used with a whipping motion will raise welts of a much more serious nature.
So, unless we do not care what our reader thinks has happened to the bottom under duress, it behooves us to give enough clues that the picture in the reader's mind is the one that we wish to draw.
Hold out your hand
We spankos prefer it when the bottom is the target of punitive action - it is what makes us what we are.
But not exclusively so - which raises an interesting question at what point does the infliction of pain to some part of the body lose any interest for us. Up front, I would say that tooth-ache has nothing of interest to the vast majority of us. And a migraine is largely of the agenda of pain sensations that set off our internal tingle.
But what about a young lady holding out her hand to have its palm strapped or - more rarely - given one or more stokes of the cane. Well, the sight is no stranger to most of us. Because the practice was so wide spread in post-war English school discipline, it does make an appearance in both literature and video. Is it erotic? Sometimes, I guess. A person holding out their hand for pain to be inflicted upon it is about as submissive an act as any one can imagine - right up there with touching one's toes for a similar fate to be inflicted upon a backside. Submission is definitely among our possible buttons, and getting the palm of one's hand caned or strapped was, in real life, as about non-consensual as it ever got. The actress is a willing victim, but when in such a posture of complete submission it is easy to pretend that she is not.
Blows across the shoulder and upper back turn up so often in videos of a more punitive nature, that the producers know they have tapped into a money making line. Before getting, say, 25 strokes of a quirt across her backside, the recipient first gets 25 across the back. It is not clear to me why a back whipping can intrigue, particular when a bottom one is going to follow, but it is common enough as to be standard fare.
On the other hand, blows inflicted elsewhere to the body simply do not interest me that much. Frontal whippings are not part of my personal foible, and inflicting pain on the private parts, for me, is quite a turn off.
So my works almost invariably lead to a female getting her bottom spanked. And there is very little deviation from that one outcome. For my readers, this is just fine - they want to read about ladies of varying ages getting enjoyable or unenjoyable bottom warmings, and they know that is where my tales are going to take them.
For you and your readers, you need to decide if you are going to stay mainstream, or fill a niche. And once you have so chosen, there are enough potential readers to keep you happy.
But not exclusively so - which raises an interesting question at what point does the infliction of pain to some part of the body lose any interest for us. Up front, I would say that tooth-ache has nothing of interest to the vast majority of us. And a migraine is largely of the agenda of pain sensations that set off our internal tingle.
But what about a young lady holding out her hand to have its palm strapped or - more rarely - given one or more stokes of the cane. Well, the sight is no stranger to most of us. Because the practice was so wide spread in post-war English school discipline, it does make an appearance in both literature and video. Is it erotic? Sometimes, I guess. A person holding out their hand for pain to be inflicted upon it is about as submissive an act as any one can imagine - right up there with touching one's toes for a similar fate to be inflicted upon a backside. Submission is definitely among our possible buttons, and getting the palm of one's hand caned or strapped was, in real life, as about non-consensual as it ever got. The actress is a willing victim, but when in such a posture of complete submission it is easy to pretend that she is not.
Blows across the shoulder and upper back turn up so often in videos of a more punitive nature, that the producers know they have tapped into a money making line. Before getting, say, 25 strokes of a quirt across her backside, the recipient first gets 25 across the back. It is not clear to me why a back whipping can intrigue, particular when a bottom one is going to follow, but it is common enough as to be standard fare.
On the other hand, blows inflicted elsewhere to the body simply do not interest me that much. Frontal whippings are not part of my personal foible, and inflicting pain on the private parts, for me, is quite a turn off.
So my works almost invariably lead to a female getting her bottom spanked. And there is very little deviation from that one outcome. For my readers, this is just fine - they want to read about ladies of varying ages getting enjoyable or unenjoyable bottom warmings, and they know that is where my tales are going to take them.
For you and your readers, you need to decide if you are going to stay mainstream, or fill a niche. And once you have so chosen, there are enough potential readers to keep you happy.
Monday, July 20, 2015
Hello, my little spanko...
As you are acutely aware, even though the internet has torn down the curtain to reveal that million upon million of us (up to 20% of all adults according to some) enjoy some aspects of the spanking scene, we are extremely shy about telling others that we have our foible.
Which makes meeting up with like minds a little difficult.
Suppose, for the sake of illustration, you were a man seeking a female companion - you could not possibly start strike-up conversations with the line "Hello little girl, you look as if you have been naughty. Does your naughty bottom deserve a spank or two?" Well, I suppose it is not impossible, but even if you happened to be chatting with a spanko, the chances are that you will have turned her right off getting involved with you.
If you think about it, exactly the same difficulty arises for vanillas trying to pick up other vanillas for some vanilla styled sex. An opening line of "Would you like to go to bed with me?" is one fraught with rejection of all manner of reasons.
Vanilla or spanko - we all have to dance some sort of dance first. Except vanillas do not have to introduce the topic of sex into the negotiation: that is somewhat something of a given when two start the tango that might lead to a bedtime romp.
We spankos do not have spanking as a given in the negotiations: there is a 50% chance our new colleague has no interest in spanking activity whatsoever, a 25% chance they can tolerate some as a sort of "slap and tickle" approach to foreplay, and 25% are hoping against hope that you share the same burning desire that they do. Bringing up spanking gives you a 50/50 shot of it being a turn off, and the same chance it might lead to a butt getting a whack or two. While those are not bad odds, the act of tossing the dice means that we have to show our interest, in outright breach of the secrecy we need according to paragraph one above.
So - what can we do. Well, first we can hang about on chat forums; that gives us anonymity while revealing our deepest secrets. But that is a less than stellar way of finding a real life partner to share some real life activity.
We could attend a "munch" - a meeting of spankos for entertainment and meet up purposes. But any recovery attempt to deny our spanko nature is doomed to failure. Another certain breach of secrecy.
We really are left with simply trying to broach the subject while in a one-to-one meeting, in such a way that both parties can do a recovery if the other is clearly not a spanko.
Arm yourself with suitable seques into any topic that makes no statement about what you are hoping to hear. Television becomes a topic? There have been masses of TV startles lately - you should be able to bring one to mind without it being on the lines of "Amy clearly loved getting spanked by Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory. How about you?" Your own childhood days? Aw come on - you have to be able to say something about how today's anti-spanking policy is affecting the public behavior of children. And that gives a good reason to ask your companion what sort of discipline they got when they were younger. Which might be an interesting topic in its own right.
If your partner makes some sort of mild gaffe, you have a chance to introduce the lame joke, with a very broad smile, "It seems that you were not beaten often enough or hard enough when you were younger - and it now shows." Not a rib tickler, and not brought in as such - the reaction to those words might tell you so much about your new potential partner that you will both know how the land lies.
In the manner of a cast member of "Astronaut Wives' Club" you might simply give a friendly swat to the rump of your acquaintance. An annoyed protest can be countered with "Sorry - I was just giving your bottom a friendly compliment for being so attractive." It allows you to recover from a hostile response, and move forward if the response was clearly not of a hostile nature.
Now - we would not be having this discussion if being a spanko was not seen as needing to be a carefully kept secret. Maybe we should all join in some sort of world wide coming out campaign. And the act of coming out might bring very pleasant surprises in its wake.
Which makes meeting up with like minds a little difficult.
Suppose, for the sake of illustration, you were a man seeking a female companion - you could not possibly start strike-up conversations with the line "Hello little girl, you look as if you have been naughty. Does your naughty bottom deserve a spank or two?" Well, I suppose it is not impossible, but even if you happened to be chatting with a spanko, the chances are that you will have turned her right off getting involved with you.
If you think about it, exactly the same difficulty arises for vanillas trying to pick up other vanillas for some vanilla styled sex. An opening line of "Would you like to go to bed with me?" is one fraught with rejection of all manner of reasons.
Vanilla or spanko - we all have to dance some sort of dance first. Except vanillas do not have to introduce the topic of sex into the negotiation: that is somewhat something of a given when two start the tango that might lead to a bedtime romp.
We spankos do not have spanking as a given in the negotiations: there is a 50% chance our new colleague has no interest in spanking activity whatsoever, a 25% chance they can tolerate some as a sort of "slap and tickle" approach to foreplay, and 25% are hoping against hope that you share the same burning desire that they do. Bringing up spanking gives you a 50/50 shot of it being a turn off, and the same chance it might lead to a butt getting a whack or two. While those are not bad odds, the act of tossing the dice means that we have to show our interest, in outright breach of the secrecy we need according to paragraph one above.
So - what can we do. Well, first we can hang about on chat forums; that gives us anonymity while revealing our deepest secrets. But that is a less than stellar way of finding a real life partner to share some real life activity.
We could attend a "munch" - a meeting of spankos for entertainment and meet up purposes. But any recovery attempt to deny our spanko nature is doomed to failure. Another certain breach of secrecy.
We really are left with simply trying to broach the subject while in a one-to-one meeting, in such a way that both parties can do a recovery if the other is clearly not a spanko.
Arm yourself with suitable seques into any topic that makes no statement about what you are hoping to hear. Television becomes a topic? There have been masses of TV startles lately - you should be able to bring one to mind without it being on the lines of "Amy clearly loved getting spanked by Sheldon in The Big Bang Theory. How about you?" Your own childhood days? Aw come on - you have to be able to say something about how today's anti-spanking policy is affecting the public behavior of children. And that gives a good reason to ask your companion what sort of discipline they got when they were younger. Which might be an interesting topic in its own right.
If your partner makes some sort of mild gaffe, you have a chance to introduce the lame joke, with a very broad smile, "It seems that you were not beaten often enough or hard enough when you were younger - and it now shows." Not a rib tickler, and not brought in as such - the reaction to those words might tell you so much about your new potential partner that you will both know how the land lies.
In the manner of a cast member of "Astronaut Wives' Club" you might simply give a friendly swat to the rump of your acquaintance. An annoyed protest can be countered with "Sorry - I was just giving your bottom a friendly compliment for being so attractive." It allows you to recover from a hostile response, and move forward if the response was clearly not of a hostile nature.
Now - we would not be having this discussion if being a spanko was not seen as needing to be a carefully kept secret. Maybe we should all join in some sort of world wide coming out campaign. And the act of coming out might bring very pleasant surprises in its wake.
Bound to succeed
Sometimes the person about to be spanked is first securely tied to the bench - or other item acting as a spanking bench - before the first stroke is administered.
In the real life world of historic non-consensual beatings, such an act was often part of the ritual: one example - before a bosun did everything he could to impart serious pain into a miscreant's backside, the victim would be secured across a cannon, so that escape was impossible and the entire ordeal would be completed in one session.
Partly for this reason, some domestic discipline scenarios have a similar ritual - the penitent is secured so that a full measure of discipline may be administered. But, I suspect, only partly.
Nowadays, I would hazard all adult to adult spankings are completely consensual: for those that are not lead to rapid appearances before some criminal court to be asked to explain just what one was thinking.
But sometimes the pretense that it is not consensual adds a peppery tingle to the session. So a second reason that a person may allow themselves to be secured by wrist and ankle to a frame is that, to some degree, the beating is out of control of the one on the receiving end. There is trust that the caning, paddling or whipping will stay within the bounds of being reasonable, but it is no longer possible to simply stand up and walk away if it is not.
But many of those with a liking for spanking also have the fellow foible of bondage. When a lady willingly touches her toes to be dealt with in an appropriate manner - that act of submission carries many level of overtone in it. And to demure to being securely fastened is one of the ultimate acts of submission.
So - when one adult secures another prior to a beating, there are many forces that have come into play: the submission, the non-consensual nature, and that it is not impossible that pain thresholds might be crossed. A heady mixture - so heady, I am among those who agree it is one that should only be shared by partners who have earned complete trust in each other.
It would be a disaster to find that your newest, most charming partner is actually an utter sadist once you have made it impossible for you stop any more pain being inflicted. Only the most dedicated masochist would enjoy such a session - and, to the surprise of vanillas - very few spankos who enjoy being on the receiving end meet the definition of having masochistic tendencies.
If your writing takes your characters into being tied up and spanked, it does not have to turn into a Mood Pictures pain fest. The delights, sensations and emotions of being secured and whacked can be explored in depth, without the victim having to endure some sort of torture session. Just a very intense one.
Even in our wildest fantasies, having one eye of it all being SSC is not a bad idea.
In the real life world of historic non-consensual beatings, such an act was often part of the ritual: one example - before a bosun did everything he could to impart serious pain into a miscreant's backside, the victim would be secured across a cannon, so that escape was impossible and the entire ordeal would be completed in one session.
Partly for this reason, some domestic discipline scenarios have a similar ritual - the penitent is secured so that a full measure of discipline may be administered. But, I suspect, only partly.
Nowadays, I would hazard all adult to adult spankings are completely consensual: for those that are not lead to rapid appearances before some criminal court to be asked to explain just what one was thinking.
But sometimes the pretense that it is not consensual adds a peppery tingle to the session. So a second reason that a person may allow themselves to be secured by wrist and ankle to a frame is that, to some degree, the beating is out of control of the one on the receiving end. There is trust that the caning, paddling or whipping will stay within the bounds of being reasonable, but it is no longer possible to simply stand up and walk away if it is not.
But many of those with a liking for spanking also have the fellow foible of bondage. When a lady willingly touches her toes to be dealt with in an appropriate manner - that act of submission carries many level of overtone in it. And to demure to being securely fastened is one of the ultimate acts of submission.
So - when one adult secures another prior to a beating, there are many forces that have come into play: the submission, the non-consensual nature, and that it is not impossible that pain thresholds might be crossed. A heady mixture - so heady, I am among those who agree it is one that should only be shared by partners who have earned complete trust in each other.
It would be a disaster to find that your newest, most charming partner is actually an utter sadist once you have made it impossible for you stop any more pain being inflicted. Only the most dedicated masochist would enjoy such a session - and, to the surprise of vanillas - very few spankos who enjoy being on the receiving end meet the definition of having masochistic tendencies.
If your writing takes your characters into being tied up and spanked, it does not have to turn into a Mood Pictures pain fest. The delights, sensations and emotions of being secured and whacked can be explored in depth, without the victim having to endure some sort of torture session. Just a very intense one.
Even in our wildest fantasies, having one eye of it all being SSC is not a bad idea.
Sunday, July 19, 2015
We all have a role to play
Vanillas often wonder why spankos sometimes go to - in their words - laughable lengths by taking part in elaborate role play, as part of their spanking activities. Two consenting adults - right? - so why not just let the whacking begin?
First, role play allows a ritual to be introduced into a session that adds to it something extra to simply grabbing a partner and whacking away indiscriminately. By way of example, if your ideal spanking includes scolding before and during, and corner time afterwards - unless into some very serious domestic discipline arrangement - both parties need to play some sort of role where such activity is expected, tolerated and, at some level, satisfy an internal need.
Second, it is very easy in role play to take on the pretense that the person getting the spanking does not wish to be spanked. We all want to think, at times, the person being spanked would prefer to be elsewhere other than on the receiving end of a good hiding, So, when husband and wife play the roles of schoolmaster and schoolgirl, it is not (necessarily) to pretend that the wife has returned to virginal purity, but that when she gets punished, she is a most unwilling victim.
Third, role play allows us to explore and revel in experiences out of our normal everyday routines, and even out of our own lifetimes. Imagining what it might have been like if in a prior life you had been a warder at Bridewell, and really had to deal with prisoners in a formal and brutal way when they broke prison regulations - well, unless you try it, by role playing, you will never know.
And finally - and possibly the most important reason - role play can set up a situation where there is gong to be a spanking purely for the spanking's sake, And nothing else. If a wife is playing the role of a school girl, for her teacher to indulge in sexual activity afterwards - as her teacher - would be beyond the bounds of the role play in an all usual circumstances. Other than in more racy erotica, any school teacher who had sex with a student would do so at extreme peril for their continued liberty - and if nothing else, that background nag would probably take all the enjoyment out of the affair,.
Four very valid reasons for role playing - but each one guaranteed to make the average vanilla shake their head is amused disbelief. Still, one of the sure fire ways to recruit a vanilla to our ranks is to get them to first take part in a role play session. But we shall leave that notion for a future post.
First, role play allows a ritual to be introduced into a session that adds to it something extra to simply grabbing a partner and whacking away indiscriminately. By way of example, if your ideal spanking includes scolding before and during, and corner time afterwards - unless into some very serious domestic discipline arrangement - both parties need to play some sort of role where such activity is expected, tolerated and, at some level, satisfy an internal need.
Second, it is very easy in role play to take on the pretense that the person getting the spanking does not wish to be spanked. We all want to think, at times, the person being spanked would prefer to be elsewhere other than on the receiving end of a good hiding, So, when husband and wife play the roles of schoolmaster and schoolgirl, it is not (necessarily) to pretend that the wife has returned to virginal purity, but that when she gets punished, she is a most unwilling victim.
Third, role play allows us to explore and revel in experiences out of our normal everyday routines, and even out of our own lifetimes. Imagining what it might have been like if in a prior life you had been a warder at Bridewell, and really had to deal with prisoners in a formal and brutal way when they broke prison regulations - well, unless you try it, by role playing, you will never know.
And finally - and possibly the most important reason - role play can set up a situation where there is gong to be a spanking purely for the spanking's sake, And nothing else. If a wife is playing the role of a school girl, for her teacher to indulge in sexual activity afterwards - as her teacher - would be beyond the bounds of the role play in an all usual circumstances. Other than in more racy erotica, any school teacher who had sex with a student would do so at extreme peril for their continued liberty - and if nothing else, that background nag would probably take all the enjoyment out of the affair,.
Four very valid reasons for role playing - but each one guaranteed to make the average vanilla shake their head is amused disbelief. Still, one of the sure fire ways to recruit a vanilla to our ranks is to get them to first take part in a role play session. But we shall leave that notion for a future post.
A question of gender
There is a shorthand convention to describe the participants in a spanking scene: F=Adult Female, f=Young Female, M=Adult Male and m=Young Male. Thus, a mother spanking her daughter can be shortened to F/f and the standard adult relationship is M/F.
You can play around with the letters to see if you get inspiration for some new angle you have not worked on before. For example, is it possible to write a realistic scenario for bb/FF? - or, if the idea turns you on, could you create some quite fantastical episode where two lads end up walloping the backsides of two mature ladies? M/Fffffff suggests a headmaster who is tasked with caning several schoolgirls and their teacher to boot. Highly improbable but not completely unworkable. And so on.
It was in this way that I found one of my one road blocks in writing spanking fiction. If find if I write a F/M scene, it comes out awkwardly unrealistic and M/M is just downright impossible for me. Not that I have anything against real world instances of M/M discipline, nor M/M as SSC conduct between consenting adults - it is just that I find no personal interest in writing about such events. And when I constructed a plot that made a F/M scene inevitable, I had to find a collaborating author to construct something that was realistic and entertaining.
But I am not alone in this outlook. Surveys suggest that a mere 2% of spankos want to read or view M/M spankings, and the number looking for such material is considerably smaller when the respondents are vanilla.
You need to take note that for entertainment purposes, the majority want to read about /F and /f spankings. If you are catering for a niche audience, you don't need to worry - but if not, you ought to keep in mind what the average spanko reader wants, if you are going to rely on repeat readers.
Most of the time, our readers want and expect the person being spanked to be a female. I am not a qualified psychologist, so can only surmise that the "normal" human mindset - that puts males into a more dominant and females into more submissive one - echoes a widespread belief of normal behavior, and therefore one that is more acceptable, in material meant to entertain us.
Try to imagine, for example, the final spanking scene in McLintock! with a role reversal - Maureen O'Hara now chases John Wayne all around town and eventually whacks him with a coal shovel, It would be very hard for that version to come across as light-hearted and as natural as the scene we actually got. I suppose it is all part of the human condition.
The F/F and F/f formats are more widely read, for it is a female bottom that gets whacked. M/M and M/m are less easily read, for the majority of us really do not empathize with any degree of relish the thought of a male bottom getting whacked. There are exceptions, but few and far between.
So if you should find that you are inspired to write a f/M, of a m/M tale that is not parody, but a serious attempt to entertain, do not be overly surprised if your readers do not praise you lavishly.
You can play around with the letters to see if you get inspiration for some new angle you have not worked on before. For example, is it possible to write a realistic scenario for bb/FF? - or, if the idea turns you on, could you create some quite fantastical episode where two lads end up walloping the backsides of two mature ladies? M/Fffffff suggests a headmaster who is tasked with caning several schoolgirls and their teacher to boot. Highly improbable but not completely unworkable. And so on.
It was in this way that I found one of my one road blocks in writing spanking fiction. If find if I write a F/M scene, it comes out awkwardly unrealistic and M/M is just downright impossible for me. Not that I have anything against real world instances of M/M discipline, nor M/M as SSC conduct between consenting adults - it is just that I find no personal interest in writing about such events. And when I constructed a plot that made a F/M scene inevitable, I had to find a collaborating author to construct something that was realistic and entertaining.
But I am not alone in this outlook. Surveys suggest that a mere 2% of spankos want to read or view M/M spankings, and the number looking for such material is considerably smaller when the respondents are vanilla.
You need to take note that for entertainment purposes, the majority want to read about /F and /f spankings. If you are catering for a niche audience, you don't need to worry - but if not, you ought to keep in mind what the average spanko reader wants, if you are going to rely on repeat readers.
Most of the time, our readers want and expect the person being spanked to be a female. I am not a qualified psychologist, so can only surmise that the "normal" human mindset - that puts males into a more dominant and females into more submissive one - echoes a widespread belief of normal behavior, and therefore one that is more acceptable, in material meant to entertain us.
Try to imagine, for example, the final spanking scene in McLintock! with a role reversal - Maureen O'Hara now chases John Wayne all around town and eventually whacks him with a coal shovel, It would be very hard for that version to come across as light-hearted and as natural as the scene we actually got. I suppose it is all part of the human condition.
The F/F and F/f formats are more widely read, for it is a female bottom that gets whacked. M/M and M/m are less easily read, for the majority of us really do not empathize with any degree of relish the thought of a male bottom getting whacked. There are exceptions, but few and far between.
So if you should find that you are inspired to write a f/M, of a m/M tale that is not parody, but a serious attempt to entertain, do not be overly surprised if your readers do not praise you lavishly.
Saturday, July 18, 2015
When did it start for you?
It is now seen that spankos divide into two distinct groups: those who got the first inkling of their interest before the age of 10, and those who acquired it during or after puberty.
I am in the process of constructing a new Spanking survey to try to highlight all the differences between the two groups (suggestions for interesting questions greatly appreciated) but for now, I would like to discuss one that seems to be pretty widespread - but definitely not universal.
We find that vanillas do not understand - indeed cannot understand - the idea of a spanking just for the spanking's sake itself. Particularly if no element of discipline is involved. She has a need to have her bottom slapped hard, engenders such an outcome and that is it. No erotic play of any kind, no sex - nothing. The spanking was the be all and end all of the incident.
In discussions with fellow spankos, there are some of us who also don't really understand a spanking for a spanking's sake. It is, in their world view, a prelude to sex or part of foreplay and for them even a discipline spanking is too far outside the SSC equation.
So far, all the spankos I have come across with this mindset are what we might call "late starters" - they acquired the taste at or after puberty.
And that makes a great deal of sense to me.
The 75% of us who started young, tended to find the idea of a spanking to be quite delightful, but the practice to be very unpleasant. It happens, but it is rare, that young spankos actually put themselves into trouble simply to get another spanking. It is the thought, not the deed, that intrigues. (There are a number of theories as to why the young body acts like this, but that is for another post).
After puberty, the 75% of us find that our existing spank drive often gets wrapped around our new sex drive. And actual spanking activity can take place without any sense of fear or loathing. A correspondent told me that for the longest time in early teen-hood, she thought the words spanking and masturbation were synonyms. We have two separate drives that often intertwine, but they are separate.
The 25% latecomers had a sex drive in place before the spanking one got built. Again there are a number of theories to explain how this comes about, but they all try to show the mechanics of adding a spanking drive TO a sex drive. Latecomers do not have two drives, the have one which has two distinct featues.
Thus, some of us have two drives and a spanking for a spanking's sake satisfies the one completely, and the rest have only one: and for them, usually, a spanking without sex just seems somewhat incomplete.
p.s. If you do have any thoughts on questions to try to reveal other differences, do drop me a line.
I am in the process of constructing a new Spanking survey to try to highlight all the differences between the two groups (suggestions for interesting questions greatly appreciated) but for now, I would like to discuss one that seems to be pretty widespread - but definitely not universal.
We find that vanillas do not understand - indeed cannot understand - the idea of a spanking just for the spanking's sake itself. Particularly if no element of discipline is involved. She has a need to have her bottom slapped hard, engenders such an outcome and that is it. No erotic play of any kind, no sex - nothing. The spanking was the be all and end all of the incident.
In discussions with fellow spankos, there are some of us who also don't really understand a spanking for a spanking's sake. It is, in their world view, a prelude to sex or part of foreplay and for them even a discipline spanking is too far outside the SSC equation.
So far, all the spankos I have come across with this mindset are what we might call "late starters" - they acquired the taste at or after puberty.
And that makes a great deal of sense to me.
The 75% of us who started young, tended to find the idea of a spanking to be quite delightful, but the practice to be very unpleasant. It happens, but it is rare, that young spankos actually put themselves into trouble simply to get another spanking. It is the thought, not the deed, that intrigues. (There are a number of theories as to why the young body acts like this, but that is for another post).
After puberty, the 75% of us find that our existing spank drive often gets wrapped around our new sex drive. And actual spanking activity can take place without any sense of fear or loathing. A correspondent told me that for the longest time in early teen-hood, she thought the words spanking and masturbation were synonyms. We have two separate drives that often intertwine, but they are separate.
The 25% latecomers had a sex drive in place before the spanking one got built. Again there are a number of theories to explain how this comes about, but they all try to show the mechanics of adding a spanking drive TO a sex drive. Latecomers do not have two drives, the have one which has two distinct featues.
Thus, some of us have two drives and a spanking for a spanking's sake satisfies the one completely, and the rest have only one: and for them, usually, a spanking without sex just seems somewhat incomplete.
p.s. If you do have any thoughts on questions to try to reveal other differences, do drop me a line.
Friday, July 17, 2015
Innocent bystanders
In times gone by, it was common for corporal punishment to be carried out in some public place, so that citizens could see justice being done, take heed that such an outcome could be in their own future if they strayed too far, and to make the ordeal more unpleasant for the sinner.
Indeed, at most school's in the UK when corporal punishment was still permitted, the ultimate sanction was to be caned in front of the whole school. The only crime that seemed to merit such a public setting was that of stealing, and about once a year we would be assembled in the main hall to watch someone caught shoplifting getting a public beating. And learned to refrain from helping ourselves to goods freely available to the light fingered when visiting department stores.
In the main, domestic spankings were private affairs, conducted behind closed bedroom doors. The yells and yelps of the wrongdoer alerted the siblings to how severe retribution could be, but, usually it was a private matter between parent and child. There were exceptions. Notably, Bridget Bardot was once spanked in front of her entire family for having caused a valuable antique vase to get broken, but she was an exception, not the norm of how things were done in the recent past.
Public spankings of an erotic nature are a different matter. The spanker and the spankee are there to enjoy themselves and part of the enjoyment is a group of aficionados looking on with the tingle that might come from the echo of someone else getting a sore bottom. I have never actually attended such a session, not as participant and not as onlooker so I can only surmise that you need to overcome a fair degree of embarrassment in order to fit in comfortably. Erotic spankings are usually meant to lead to more intimate activities, and I am reasonably certain that the more intimate activities were not part of the entertainment watched by the audience..
For us authors of spanking fiction, setting up the plot so that a spanking - whether consensual to some degree or not - leads to interesting possibilities in examining the emotions of all concerned. From that felt by an elder woman, grimly pleased to see a young hussy getting her just deserts, through to pleasure felt by some males when they watch a female bottom bouncing up and down, through to the humiliation burning at the wretched wretch getting thoroughly paddled.
There are so many possibilities for us to explore, I shall return to this topic again in the near future. In the meantime, do experiment with putting your spanking in a public place and see where that plot device leads you.
Indeed, at most school's in the UK when corporal punishment was still permitted, the ultimate sanction was to be caned in front of the whole school. The only crime that seemed to merit such a public setting was that of stealing, and about once a year we would be assembled in the main hall to watch someone caught shoplifting getting a public beating. And learned to refrain from helping ourselves to goods freely available to the light fingered when visiting department stores.
In the main, domestic spankings were private affairs, conducted behind closed bedroom doors. The yells and yelps of the wrongdoer alerted the siblings to how severe retribution could be, but, usually it was a private matter between parent and child. There were exceptions. Notably, Bridget Bardot was once spanked in front of her entire family for having caused a valuable antique vase to get broken, but she was an exception, not the norm of how things were done in the recent past.
Public spankings of an erotic nature are a different matter. The spanker and the spankee are there to enjoy themselves and part of the enjoyment is a group of aficionados looking on with the tingle that might come from the echo of someone else getting a sore bottom. I have never actually attended such a session, not as participant and not as onlooker so I can only surmise that you need to overcome a fair degree of embarrassment in order to fit in comfortably. Erotic spankings are usually meant to lead to more intimate activities, and I am reasonably certain that the more intimate activities were not part of the entertainment watched by the audience..
For us authors of spanking fiction, setting up the plot so that a spanking - whether consensual to some degree or not - leads to interesting possibilities in examining the emotions of all concerned. From that felt by an elder woman, grimly pleased to see a young hussy getting her just deserts, through to pleasure felt by some males when they watch a female bottom bouncing up and down, through to the humiliation burning at the wretched wretch getting thoroughly paddled.
There are so many possibilities for us to explore, I shall return to this topic again in the near future. In the meantime, do experiment with putting your spanking in a public place and see where that plot device leads you.
Making scenes
Stories without any scene setting abound among spanking authors: we are drilled into the standard plot (there is going to be a spanking, there is a spanking, there was a spanking) that using up valuable white space with petty descriptions of where it all happened seems, to many of us, to have a very low return on investment.
So we get sloppy: she is caught smoking, gets sent to the headmistress's office, has her backside caned, and rues the sad adventure. There is no need to spend time and effort describing what a school looks like, what a musty dank corridor leading to the office looks like, or what impact the oak panels have in casting a solemn countenance to the tragic events.
And - full disclosure - I have done the same. Admittedly, in the torrid little pot boiler "Atonement", the leaving out a scene setting paragraph was one of the deliberate mistakes you were supposed to spot. But in other would-be "masterpieces", the omission was just careless idleness.
Now, you do not need a huge wad of material to set up a scene, Tolkien spent over a whole page describing a hole in the ground - an exceptional whole in the ground mind - but some of our tales take less than a whole page in total. We need to cut our dress according to our cloth, to coin a phrase, for it would be a tad peculiar to spend the whole narrative in setting up a scene and not going anywhere with it..
A scene setter needs to give the reader enough background material for the rest of the tale to have substance. And we need not go to lengths. For instance, suppose you want to describe a beating in the manner of the way one might be dished out in the Royal Navy - back in the days of George III. You don't have to overdo it.
But it does not take many words to set out the store of what is to follow. If you are working on a school girl gets the cane for smoking tale, I really think it behooves a few opening lines to lay out the red brick stones of your old all-female academy, shiny from a light rain shower. And those oak panels in the Headmistress's study are surely worthy of a mention - they have been there for years and years waiting for you to acknowledge how solemn they make the scene. But the best thing, your readers will be more comfy in understanding where your narrative takes them.
So we get sloppy: she is caught smoking, gets sent to the headmistress's office, has her backside caned, and rues the sad adventure. There is no need to spend time and effort describing what a school looks like, what a musty dank corridor leading to the office looks like, or what impact the oak panels have in casting a solemn countenance to the tragic events.
And - full disclosure - I have done the same. Admittedly, in the torrid little pot boiler "Atonement", the leaving out a scene setting paragraph was one of the deliberate mistakes you were supposed to spot. But in other would-be "masterpieces", the omission was just careless idleness.
Now, you do not need a huge wad of material to set up a scene, Tolkien spent over a whole page describing a hole in the ground - an exceptional whole in the ground mind - but some of our tales take less than a whole page in total. We need to cut our dress according to our cloth, to coin a phrase, for it would be a tad peculiar to spend the whole narrative in setting up a scene and not going anywhere with it..
A scene setter needs to give the reader enough background material for the rest of the tale to have substance. And we need not go to lengths. For instance, suppose you want to describe a beating in the manner of the way one might be dished out in the Royal Navy - back in the days of George III. You don't have to overdo it.
Eight days out of Portsmouth, HMS Banshee, a 120-gun ship of the line, was in full sail as she ploughed South through light swell en-route to join the sixth flotilla in the Indian Ocean. Her sails were a brilliant white in the morning sun, and her pennants told the world at large that she carried a Commodore as officer in command. Two frigates and one supply ship maintained station to her rear.And that is quite enough to show that the action is aboard a military war ship, far out at sea, on a bright sunny morning. Even so, some rather dreary research was necessary to avoid making a huge error in the set up.
But it does not take many words to set out the store of what is to follow. If you are working on a school girl gets the cane for smoking tale, I really think it behooves a few opening lines to lay out the red brick stones of your old all-female academy, shiny from a light rain shower. And those oak panels in the Headmistress's study are surely worthy of a mention - they have been there for years and years waiting for you to acknowledge how solemn they make the scene. But the best thing, your readers will be more comfy in understanding where your narrative takes them.
Thursday, July 16, 2015
Warming up the bottom
Mainly from the influence of spanking videos, and a long established practice among consenting adults, the "warm up" is a standard part of the spanking scene.
And so it should. When two consenting adults decide to liven up their bedroom romp with a slap or two to the rump, a full blooded whack with a riding crop - as the opening slap - might not lead to the marital bliss initially hoped for. A set of light slaps inures the buttocks from later harder smacks, and one cane move slowly up the scale, at all times keeping on the "right" side of the partner's pain threshold. Erotic spankings never really hurt, even if the final few swipes would bring a nod of acknowledgement from a Royal Navy bosun of years gone by.
On the other hand, if some wrong doer is being punished, warming up goes completely against the intent of physical discipline. The aim is to instantly and significantly cross the victim's threshold of pain to try to ensure there is no repetition of the behavior that caused the punishment to be imposed in the first place. The whacks do not have to be excessive - they simply have to be effective. It is not absolutely necessary to use a fearsome weapon to impose the necessary degree of compliance - a bare hand may smack with enough force to make the resultant yelp of annoyed pain to be genuine, and to cause contriteness.
There are two complications you might need to deal with as a spanking fiction writer.
The first is the "willing victim" syndrome. The young lady (or young man in today's egalitarian society) may want to enjoy all the sensations of being an unwilling victim, but only because they want to feel those emotions. And in real life, as in fiction, the wielder of the cane walks a very tricky line of wanting each stroke to be just a tiny little over the pain threshold, but not too far as to invoke a safe word. The beating has to be painful, but not overly so. In this situation, it is not a genuine warm up that takes place, but as the victim's bottom gets sorer, the pain threshold moves, and the strokes need to become firmer so as to keep the same small degree ahead of the pain threshold. In real life, it can take partners years to get this exactly right - but the characters in your story can rejoice in the fact you will always be right on the money for the intensity they need for every single stroke you describe.
The second complication comes from watching too many spanking videos. There are some that depict real good hidings, but they usually last less than five minutes/ So for longer videos different dynamics apply. Partly from the fact that a lot of discipline actresses in longer videos need warming up before the real action begins, and partly from the director's need to fill a lot of time with some sort of relevant action. Either way, a penitent is likely get a hand spanking on her skirt, followed by a paddle or brush on the seat of the panties and finally a strap or cane across the bare backside. For those who want pure discipline, when watching such a video, the fast forward button quickly gets the viewer to the action they want to watch. However, when reading a tale, skimming forward is not so precise.
In sum - if you write about consensual spankings, a warm up sequence is virtually mandatory. And when waxing lyrical about punishment spankings, a warm up should rarely if ever be part of the narrative.
But as always, cater for you readers above any other consideration - if they happen to be avid advocates of warm up activity come what may, their need completely trumps any advice of mine of a more general nature.
And so it should. When two consenting adults decide to liven up their bedroom romp with a slap or two to the rump, a full blooded whack with a riding crop - as the opening slap - might not lead to the marital bliss initially hoped for. A set of light slaps inures the buttocks from later harder smacks, and one cane move slowly up the scale, at all times keeping on the "right" side of the partner's pain threshold. Erotic spankings never really hurt, even if the final few swipes would bring a nod of acknowledgement from a Royal Navy bosun of years gone by.
On the other hand, if some wrong doer is being punished, warming up goes completely against the intent of physical discipline. The aim is to instantly and significantly cross the victim's threshold of pain to try to ensure there is no repetition of the behavior that caused the punishment to be imposed in the first place. The whacks do not have to be excessive - they simply have to be effective. It is not absolutely necessary to use a fearsome weapon to impose the necessary degree of compliance - a bare hand may smack with enough force to make the resultant yelp of annoyed pain to be genuine, and to cause contriteness.
There are two complications you might need to deal with as a spanking fiction writer.
The first is the "willing victim" syndrome. The young lady (or young man in today's egalitarian society) may want to enjoy all the sensations of being an unwilling victim, but only because they want to feel those emotions. And in real life, as in fiction, the wielder of the cane walks a very tricky line of wanting each stroke to be just a tiny little over the pain threshold, but not too far as to invoke a safe word. The beating has to be painful, but not overly so. In this situation, it is not a genuine warm up that takes place, but as the victim's bottom gets sorer, the pain threshold moves, and the strokes need to become firmer so as to keep the same small degree ahead of the pain threshold. In real life, it can take partners years to get this exactly right - but the characters in your story can rejoice in the fact you will always be right on the money for the intensity they need for every single stroke you describe.
The second complication comes from watching too many spanking videos. There are some that depict real good hidings, but they usually last less than five minutes/ So for longer videos different dynamics apply. Partly from the fact that a lot of discipline actresses in longer videos need warming up before the real action begins, and partly from the director's need to fill a lot of time with some sort of relevant action. Either way, a penitent is likely get a hand spanking on her skirt, followed by a paddle or brush on the seat of the panties and finally a strap or cane across the bare backside. For those who want pure discipline, when watching such a video, the fast forward button quickly gets the viewer to the action they want to watch. However, when reading a tale, skimming forward is not so precise.
In sum - if you write about consensual spankings, a warm up sequence is virtually mandatory. And when waxing lyrical about punishment spankings, a warm up should rarely if ever be part of the narrative.
But as always, cater for you readers above any other consideration - if they happen to be avid advocates of warm up activity come what may, their need completely trumps any advice of mine of a more general nature.
The new Political Correctness
Nowhere in the United States is it illegal for a parent to spank his or her offspring. It is illegal in all jurisdictions to hit a child hard enough for it to be considered abusive. But reasonable force as a reasonable measure of discipline, while not officially condoned, is accepted as part of the American way of rearing children.
Now here's some curious statistics. Nearly half of Americans polled on the topic state that they are opposed to spanking of kids. If those Americans happen to be spankos, those polls give a nearly 75% vote against kids getting spanked.
Yet if you poll kids, and adults, with the question "Did you get spanked by either of your parents/Did you spank any of your kids/ in the last twelve months?" the "Yes" answer is north of 90%.
That is, over 40% of us tell one poll we are anti-spanking, and admit to another we are do spank as a form of child discipline. Why do we go to such lengths to lie to pollsters?
In my opinion, it is the new "politically correct" attitude we are expected to display when this topic comes up. The anti-spanking brigade, using the tactics employed by all single issue fanatics, have convinced just about all of us that society does not approve of spanking, and if you do approve, then society will hate you.
Don Cobble, former pastor of a church, found out how this works in practice. He gave his son a belting, and two years later his conviction for child abuse was thrown out by the Massachusetts Supreme Court as being baseless. But by then he had lost his job and most of his friends. And is on record as saying some approached him secretively to say that they also walloped their kids, so, while sympathizing, felt it best if they kept apart for a while.
We are letting the anti-spanking fanatics dictate this debate on their terms. We need to find some way of bringing truth back to bear on the matter. Almost all single issue campaigns fail in the face of hard facts: just look at how badly the "No Vaccinations for Kids" protesters are reeling as reality about this matter comes to light.
Now here's some curious statistics. Nearly half of Americans polled on the topic state that they are opposed to spanking of kids. If those Americans happen to be spankos, those polls give a nearly 75% vote against kids getting spanked.
Yet if you poll kids, and adults, with the question "Did you get spanked by either of your parents/Did you spank any of your kids/ in the last twelve months?" the "Yes" answer is north of 90%.
That is, over 40% of us tell one poll we are anti-spanking, and admit to another we are do spank as a form of child discipline. Why do we go to such lengths to lie to pollsters?
In my opinion, it is the new "politically correct" attitude we are expected to display when this topic comes up. The anti-spanking brigade, using the tactics employed by all single issue fanatics, have convinced just about all of us that society does not approve of spanking, and if you do approve, then society will hate you.
Don Cobble, former pastor of a church, found out how this works in practice. He gave his son a belting, and two years later his conviction for child abuse was thrown out by the Massachusetts Supreme Court as being baseless. But by then he had lost his job and most of his friends. And is on record as saying some approached him secretively to say that they also walloped their kids, so, while sympathizing, felt it best if they kept apart for a while.
We are letting the anti-spanking fanatics dictate this debate on their terms. We need to find some way of bringing truth back to bear on the matter. Almost all single issue campaigns fail in the face of hard facts: just look at how badly the "No Vaccinations for Kids" protesters are reeling as reality about this matter comes to light.
Wednesday, July 15, 2015
The sound of silence
Silence? In a spanking tale? You have got to be joking. And I am - the title of a classic Simon and Garfunkel platter has only the tiniest inkling towards today's topic: which is more accurately entitled "The Sound of Spanking."
When a hand, implement or toy makes a sudden halt by coming into contact with a bottom, one effect of the impact is that a sound is made. And in describing the sound, we can often imply what is simultaneously happening to the flesh side of the equation of the strike. There is a group of words known as onomatopoeic words - they try to describe the sound made. "Whoosh" is such a word, trying to impersonate the sound of something moving quickly through the air so as to cause a rushing sound.
Some people opine that "spank" itself is one of these words - not a full onomatopoeia, but a subset known as "imitative" words. The word is not completely unlike the sound made by an actual spank. Which is why newbies to the spanking genre often have the "There is a spanking" part of the plot reduced to repeating the word 'spank' over and over. Sometimes, to show how hard the spanking is, the word is capitalized and exclamation points added as in "SPANK!! SPANK!! SPANK!!"
Now, while you and I might smile at the ineptitude of such a way of describing a spanking, there is an important lesson to be learned. We may be more verbose, we may add all manner of explanatory text, and we may use more evocative onomatopoeic words - but we are, in essence, doing the exact same thing. We are trying to describe a spanking by the sounds that the spanks make.
For instance, words like "Swissssh", and "cra-aa-aack" can be used try to add the impression of a long swoosh of implement moving rapidly through the air prior to landing.
Even so, you should note that this area is one of those where "more is less". In the way that repeating the word "spank" over and over quickly loses any element of narrative tension, the same is true of any onomatopoeic word. You get far more bang for the buck by saying something like "Six times the cane swished and cracked into her defenseless bottom" than by writing "Swish - Crack!!" six times. Letting the reader fill in the gaps sometimes is far better - for the reader may add extra color that enhances the personal reading experience (and give you all the credit for setting up the scene).
And - something you might like to try as homework - it is a very interesting exercise to create your own onomatopoeic word to describe the sound heard during a spanking. "Ssw-i-i-itt!" is one I once came up with when the disciplinarian was using a crop. I am sure you can do much better.
When a hand, implement or toy makes a sudden halt by coming into contact with a bottom, one effect of the impact is that a sound is made. And in describing the sound, we can often imply what is simultaneously happening to the flesh side of the equation of the strike. There is a group of words known as onomatopoeic words - they try to describe the sound made. "Whoosh" is such a word, trying to impersonate the sound of something moving quickly through the air so as to cause a rushing sound.
Some people opine that "spank" itself is one of these words - not a full onomatopoeia, but a subset known as "imitative" words. The word is not completely unlike the sound made by an actual spank. Which is why newbies to the spanking genre often have the "There is a spanking" part of the plot reduced to repeating the word 'spank' over and over. Sometimes, to show how hard the spanking is, the word is capitalized and exclamation points added as in "SPANK!! SPANK!! SPANK!!"
Now, while you and I might smile at the ineptitude of such a way of describing a spanking, there is an important lesson to be learned. We may be more verbose, we may add all manner of explanatory text, and we may use more evocative onomatopoeic words - but we are, in essence, doing the exact same thing. We are trying to describe a spanking by the sounds that the spanks make.
For instance, words like "Swissssh", and "cra-aa-aack" can be used try to add the impression of a long swoosh of implement moving rapidly through the air prior to landing.
Even so, you should note that this area is one of those where "more is less". In the way that repeating the word "spank" over and over quickly loses any element of narrative tension, the same is true of any onomatopoeic word. You get far more bang for the buck by saying something like "Six times the cane swished and cracked into her defenseless bottom" than by writing "Swish - Crack!!" six times. Letting the reader fill in the gaps sometimes is far better - for the reader may add extra color that enhances the personal reading experience (and give you all the credit for setting up the scene).
And - something you might like to try as homework - it is a very interesting exercise to create your own onomatopoeic word to describe the sound heard during a spanking. "Ssw-i-i-itt!" is one I once came up with when the disciplinarian was using a crop. I am sure you can do much better.
Masechuesetts takes on "Considered Spankings"
Have a guess: as a group, where will you find the largest number of people who hit children in an abusive way? The chances are that you got it wrong. The answer is Sweden. Not among adults, mind you - for Sweden totally outlawed all forms of physical discipline some 20 years ago. And they now have 500 times the number of cases - of older kids beating younger kids to pulp - than any neighboring country. 20 years of indiscipline has created a whole class of adolescents who have never been spanked once, and, for reasons yet to be determined, have no measurable degree of self discipline.
That is why we should give kudos to the Massachusetts Supreme Court, which expressly ruled for the first time that parents may not be held criminally liable for the use of “reasonable” force in disciplining their children. Very wisely they did not define "reasonable" nor its counterpart "abuse" relying on lower courts to recognize when unreasonable or abusive force had been used, by way of common sense and not a check list of indicators.
The latest research into spankings all point to the same conclusion. A considered spanking - one that is sane and reasonably safe even if totally non-consensual - is the most effective tool for instilling the longest lasting change in improving behavior of young ones.
I would be very, very surprised if it turns out that in 20 years from now Massachusetts has the same wide-spread behavioral problems in its young adolescents that Sweden now faces.
That is why we should give kudos to the Massachusetts Supreme Court, which expressly ruled for the first time that parents may not be held criminally liable for the use of “reasonable” force in disciplining their children. Very wisely they did not define "reasonable" nor its counterpart "abuse" relying on lower courts to recognize when unreasonable or abusive force had been used, by way of common sense and not a check list of indicators.
The latest research into spankings all point to the same conclusion. A considered spanking - one that is sane and reasonably safe even if totally non-consensual - is the most effective tool for instilling the longest lasting change in improving behavior of young ones.
I would be very, very surprised if it turns out that in 20 years from now Massachusetts has the same wide-spread behavioral problems in its young adolescents that Sweden now faces.
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
A Sort of 'startle' on "So You Think You Can Dance"
In the reality TV show, "So You Think You Can Dance", presenter British-born Cat Deeley acts as a sort of link between contestants and judges. She stands alongside them on stage, after the dance as ended, to sympathize if reviews are less than stellar, and give high fives for high praise.
This week, a group of 10 dancers put on a Broadway routine in which top hats and canes were used as props. After the performance was over, the ten crowded around Cat to await to hear the judges comments on how well they had performed.
Cat took one of the canes, and asked the group "Now - who has been naughty?"
No actual mayhem followed, but most viewers would have been startled by Cat's open invitation of action well suited to our way of thinking.
This week, a group of 10 dancers put on a Broadway routine in which top hats and canes were used as props. After the performance was over, the ten crowded around Cat to await to hear the judges comments on how well they had performed.
Cat took one of the canes, and asked the group "Now - who has been naughty?"
No actual mayhem followed, but most viewers would have been startled by Cat's open invitation of action well suited to our way of thinking.
Getting to the bottom
As authors of spanking fiction, sooner or later our tale has a spanking (or more) in it, and we have to decided what to do about the recipient's bottom. Apart from whacking it, I mean.
Our reader might like to know something about the size, shape and quality of the bottom about to get beaten, and we, as the author, have to decide how much to detail to give. And whether to be detail oriented, let fly with simile and/or metaphor or leave it pretty much to the reader's imagination.
Leaving it pretty much to the reader's imagination has a lot to be said for it. All bottoms worthy of smacking consist of two roughly equally sized hemispheres and, since everyone has one, it is not as the position and shape of it will come as a complete surprise to the reader. Furthermore, our readers will have their own preferences as to size, weight and wobbliness of the ideal bottom. We authors will have an inclination to make the victim's butt be of a size, weight and wobbliness that meets our own ideal, and the more we add to the description, the more we are turning off one or more of our readers. I have a preference to trim, neat and fairly lithe buttocks - and have incurred the wrath of readers who like bottoms to be big and quite gelatinous - so large that spanks cause fleshy tremors to roll back and forth.
Furthermore, if our POV is first person singular, the act of describing our "own" bottom in a detail oriented manner is not only awkward, it might seem a tad strained. Starting a sentence "My bottom is ..." gives an impression that we have an unhealthy interest in the size and shape of it, and that impression will only be strengthened by the amount of detail we add to the narrative.
So, the problematic case is when our POV is third person singular and we have decided to spend some time giving our reader a glowing picture or a butt that will soon be glowing. Back in Victorian times, underground publications that gratified the spankos back then just had to have detailed descriptions of bottoms, or fail to live up to expectations. Here is a typical passage:
At last the bottom of the Bellasis was really exposed to view. It was a real perfect posterior. It swelled out grandly, properly, and gradually from a sloping small of the back that would have satisfied a Grecian sculptor. There were two lovely dimples just above the top and below a couple of sharply-defined creases, caused by the over powering swelling of the hemispheres, now that the thighs were tightly pressed together. They showed health by their hardness, and terror by the goose-flesh look they had. It was a regal bum, yet tough withal. One that would take a fair amount of punishment.Well, it is a description.
In my book "The Gleam in Her Eye" I trapped myself into one of those holes we spanking authors usually go to great lengths to avoid - I had clearly implied that the heroine had the most beautiful bottom known to mankind - and had set myself up to describe it immediately prior to its first spanking. The most beautiful? What had I done? Using one of the standard "chicken out" techniques, this is what I wrote:
She flipped up her skirt;,placed both placed both arms ahead of her, thumbs and fingers linked, and her legs straight back to make a perfect arch over my knees. She was not wearing any underwear or stockings. Her bare pink butt lay at my hands, waiting for whatever I wanted to dish out on its perfect form.
It would take a great deal of time to detail the absolute perfection that ass represented. Metaphors of strawberries and cream would abound. Similes about Fourth of July fireworks would be included as well, no doubt. For now, to say it was absolutely breath-taking, jaw-dropping, teeth-sinking, heart-stopping, eye-popping perfect will have to be sufficient. I had far better ways of passing the next five minutes than composing odes to beauty.
And what is more incredible, I swear to you, it was as if that bottom was on bended knees pleading with me to give it some good, tenderizing, spanks.
Well, mine was somewhat light on description. But mine was supposed to be a comedic piece, so I used my poetic license to fill the promise with having to have a butt that swelled out grandly and properly. I guess my readers were grateful for that.
Monday, July 13, 2015
Back to the tread mill
My vacation was very restful and we wined and dined well, if not wisely.
Not much to report on the spanking front. "Astronaut's wives club" ( a newish prime time soap on ABC) seems to think that in the 1960's, American alpha-males would greet females by giving them a hearty swat on the butt. I am not sure that was the case, but the actresses in the series give suitably startled squeaks when they are on the receiving end of a "Hello - pleased to meet you" wallop,
The Women's World Cup soccer games posed interesting questions for those of us who like to watch such competitions without necessarily bringing an interest in all things spanking to the fore. For example, was it a matter of fashion design or genetics that gave the French team more smackable bottoms than their collective rivals? And what precisely did the Colombian players do to make them seem to be the players most in need of a salutatory trip across a knee or two? Perhaps some amateur psychologist will one day unravel those and similar questions that come to mind when we watch sports events.
Anyway, normal service is now resumed. And you have been given fair warning that that is the case ...
Not much to report on the spanking front. "Astronaut's wives club" ( a newish prime time soap on ABC) seems to think that in the 1960's, American alpha-males would greet females by giving them a hearty swat on the butt. I am not sure that was the case, but the actresses in the series give suitably startled squeaks when they are on the receiving end of a "Hello - pleased to meet you" wallop,
The Women's World Cup soccer games posed interesting questions for those of us who like to watch such competitions without necessarily bringing an interest in all things spanking to the fore. For example, was it a matter of fashion design or genetics that gave the French team more smackable bottoms than their collective rivals? And what precisely did the Colombian players do to make them seem to be the players most in need of a salutatory trip across a knee or two? Perhaps some amateur psychologist will one day unravel those and similar questions that come to mind when we watch sports events.
Anyway, normal service is now resumed. And you have been given fair warning that that is the case ...
Friday, July 3, 2015
Vacation Break
I shall be out of town for the next week, taking a break from work and, alas, from blogging.
My next post will be on Monday, July 13th and I hope to have a stack of new topics to intrigue and entertain you.
If you are in the USA, have a wonderful July 4th. And if not, I do hope you can find some good excuse to have a family gathering in order to drink beer, have a barbecue and set off some fireworks. (These activities do make a weekend more enjoyable and, perhaps, should be done more often).
My next post will be on Monday, July 13th and I hope to have a stack of new topics to intrigue and entertain you.
If you are in the USA, have a wonderful July 4th. And if not, I do hope you can find some good excuse to have a family gathering in order to drink beer, have a barbecue and set off some fireworks. (These activities do make a weekend more enjoyable and, perhaps, should be done more often).
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Spanking by Remote Control
I shall return to the general aspects of automated spankings in a later post. I thought today you might to want to share in one aspect of spanking machines: operating one from a long distance.
As far as I know, four different spanking machines have been constructed in modern times - three for commercial sale for private use, and one as a prop by a company that produces spanking videos: under various production names including the famed "Pain4Fem"..
Of the three that are available for sale to the general public, today we shall just look at how one of them gets turned into a long distance disciple machine: the Spank-O-Matic II and its close twin, the Lite version of it. For now, I shall refer to either interchangeably as the "SOM"
With a SOM, the machine that actually the delivers the spanks can be controlled by using a hand held remote controller, or by plugging it into a PC or laptop. And when plugged in to a PC, the whacks can be issued from a control screen on the computer, or from a pre-set set of instructions. Let us call the PC or laptop attached to the spanking machine by a USB cable the "local" computer.
Here's the trick - a second computer (the "remote" computer) can be connected to the local computer over the internet, and a person sitting at the remote computer can deliver instructions to the local computer as if the remote computer had access to the local computer's control screen,
That is, if your partner is in a position to get spanked from a machine attached to a local computer, you at the remote computer can decide how many, how quickly and how strongly the spanking machine will deliver its strokes. And that is true if you are sitting in the next room, or if half way across the globe,
Even if you do not have a spanking partner with a local machine, you can try out the software to visualize how it would work in practice. Free of charge.
You go to the SOM site where you can dowload two pieces of software needed to make remote controlled spankings a reality, The first delivers a library of drivers and software under the generic title of Phidgets: they give your computer the ability to send data to a second computer, provided that both have some compatible computer transmission software as well.
And the second download gets you a functioning copy of the SOM control panel. Unless you are the local machine, most of the screens are academic. But one screen is the actual SOM II manual control panel. When it is on your screen, you can enter the IP address, and the local machine password to be sent over the internet to the local version of the same software. If both id and password are correct, then your (remote) computer now has the control of the spanking machine attached to the other (local) computer.
Both downloads are free, so you can set the system up and play with it to get used to how it works, and what it is doing to your pretend partner. Until some day you connect with an online user who actually has a SOM attached to their local machine. And your role play will have taken on a whole new dimension.
As far as I know, four different spanking machines have been constructed in modern times - three for commercial sale for private use, and one as a prop by a company that produces spanking videos: under various production names including the famed "Pain4Fem"..
Of the three that are available for sale to the general public, today we shall just look at how one of them gets turned into a long distance disciple machine: the Spank-O-Matic II and its close twin, the Lite version of it. For now, I shall refer to either interchangeably as the "SOM"
With a SOM, the machine that actually the delivers the spanks can be controlled by using a hand held remote controller, or by plugging it into a PC or laptop. And when plugged in to a PC, the whacks can be issued from a control screen on the computer, or from a pre-set set of instructions. Let us call the PC or laptop attached to the spanking machine by a USB cable the "local" computer.
Here's the trick - a second computer (the "remote" computer) can be connected to the local computer over the internet, and a person sitting at the remote computer can deliver instructions to the local computer as if the remote computer had access to the local computer's control screen,
That is, if your partner is in a position to get spanked from a machine attached to a local computer, you at the remote computer can decide how many, how quickly and how strongly the spanking machine will deliver its strokes. And that is true if you are sitting in the next room, or if half way across the globe,
Even if you do not have a spanking partner with a local machine, you can try out the software to visualize how it would work in practice. Free of charge.
You go to the SOM site where you can dowload two pieces of software needed to make remote controlled spankings a reality, The first delivers a library of drivers and software under the generic title of Phidgets: they give your computer the ability to send data to a second computer, provided that both have some compatible computer transmission software as well.
And the second download gets you a functioning copy of the SOM control panel. Unless you are the local machine, most of the screens are academic. But one screen is the actual SOM II manual control panel. When it is on your screen, you can enter the IP address, and the local machine password to be sent over the internet to the local version of the same software. If both id and password are correct, then your (remote) computer now has the control of the spanking machine attached to the other (local) computer.
Both downloads are free, so you can set the system up and play with it to get used to how it works, and what it is doing to your pretend partner. Until some day you connect with an online user who actually has a SOM attached to their local machine. And your role play will have taken on a whole new dimension.
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